Christmas

It's that wonderful time of the year again. Christmas Eve was just here and the new year is only four days away. I've been home for a week and a half and I'm loving it.

I guess it's time for reflection, for thinking about what I've done, what I've learnt and what I should do better the next year. What stands out more than anything is how much I've grown up this year. They say you become a woman the first time you have sex. That's not true. For me it happened nine months ago, in March. True enough it was after I had had sex, not for the first time, but with someone I really cared about. Yes, this is where I'm going to pour my heart out, I write what I think about because it's the only way I can get it out. I need to get it out, and if you don't like it you can bite my bottom.

This year I've grown up. Emotionally. I'm still naïve and hopeful and realistically optimistic but I've taken a few steps into unknown territory, I've told someone I loved them for the first time and I've had my heart broken. I've told someone I could never love them and felt maybe I could. I've still never had a boyfriend and the thought of having one still creeps me out. I've realized how "I need my space" can hurt someone although I never meant it that way. And I know how not knowing truly is the worst thing there is. Do you know what a frozen lake looks like in March when the ice has started to crack? Something like this? That's what it feels like.

I blame no one but myself. Well actually I do, I blame someone else, someone I've loved and hated and loved again to no avail. It would have taken him five minutes to prevent all of this, but then I wouldn't have learnt this lesson, would I? I've learnt that I should feel more. I've been told I should, the person who told me meant it in a physical way but I mean it in an emotional way. It's not a bad thing to show people you don't have a heart of... ice. I've also been told I seem to have one of those. If I ever did have one it seems to have melted, otherwise I wouldn't know where all the water has come from.

Anger has faded and become disappointment.

2005 has had its ups and downs. I'll remember the ups like I always do, my life this year has been as easy and comfortable as any other year, a year and a life most people on this earth wish they could lead... with certain modifications. I have everything I could possibly need, as I always have. I'm lucky and privileged. And I'm well aware of it. Last year I was ready for 2004 to be replaced by 2005, changing years had never been easier - this one started with two weeks in the sun far away from here. This year I don't want the new one to come. I don't want this one to leave with all its unresolved issues. Letting go doesn't seem to be my style. Sorting things out is.

I want to make the mess that is my life into straight lines so I can try and sort it all out, see what is there and get my facts straight. I want to look people in the eyes and hear the truth, their truths, whether I want to know what they have to say or not.

I realize writing all this makes me seem horribly vulnerable and needy, insecure and dependent on others. It's not like me to write about real feelings but sometimes they're just there. No kinky tests or snowman pictures, just words. They're all I have.



We got a White Christmas this year as well, it snowed a lot a couple weeks ago, then it got warmer and much of it melted before it got a little colder. Today it was -12 (10F), dark, and a billion stars in the sky. I went out for a sec to try and take some pictures (mental note: short skirt and rubber boots is NOT the best thing to wear in the middle of winter). There was a thin layer of new snow, snow flakes big and glistening like they do when it's cold. The northern light, aurora borealis, was out. It was a greenish blue and it stretched like a ribbon across the sky from the west to the north, getting smaller, growing bigger, flowing back and forth.

It's a beautiful place this planet of ours.

Merry Christmas everyone!

A Little Girl in a World of Evil

What do you do when you're so angry all the muscles in your body tighten and there's nothing you can do about it? I used to get that a lot before, watching the news on tv, reading the newspaper, going through an article. There's just so much evil in this world. I'm as far away from it as anyone could possibly get but every time I saw or read something like that I'd just notice every muscle in me tense up.

It's been a while since I got that but today it came back. I read about an 11 year old Danish girl. Today the 8th man was arrested for a.. sexual assult, if you will. Her father, one among the eight, hired her out to pedophiles who had sex with her. Four men have already been convicted of buying her at age 10, and four more awaiting their trail.

What can possibly cause someone to behave in this way? Seven men, at least, paid to have sex with a 10 year old girl. Her own father handed her over. What is it I'm not seeing here? What is it that can make some people find this acceptable when the rest of us want to beat the crap out of them?

I don't know how long they'll stay in prison but I hope it's long. Rape sentencing in Norway is a joke, four years for gang raping a 12 year old, that's what people get around here. I hope Denmark does better. Something like this, and particularly what the father did, is the closest I'll ever get to agreeing with having a death penalty. But I guess someone has to die first and this girl didn't.

She's 11. She's eleven years old. She's a little kid. Where does she go from here?

The Kiwi

The prettiest fruit in the world.

The seeds are supposed to taste like pepper if you crush them. I only feel them itching at the back of my throat..

To be or not to, baby.

Fertility declines everywhere appear to be accompanied by a significant increase in contraceptive use. We must be careful here to not infer any sort of causal link, but the increased recourse to contraception is indicative of an accompanying social transformation.

Debraj Ray, Development Economics

Well I didn't think the reason was they all stopped having sex...

I did not know this...

I think someone misplaced a few of those when they made my brain and decided to replace them all with sex areas...

I knew it!

I do not remember learning about this last year but it does explain a few things...

Blow me away!

"All those in favor, say 'Aye'"

I want a lamb...

I always wanted a lamb as a pet - they're the cutest ever. Once I met a mad sheep though, it chased me down a hill and I had to jump over a gate-like-thing to get away from it. Sheeps are usually the most peaceful creatures ever but that one was maaad...

Let's have some snow!

Power to the Paintbrush

I don't wear a lot of make up. Never have. Then this morning I started thinking about it and decided to go nuts (meaning putting on what most girls put on every day). This included;

• Moisturizer (creamy stuff to stop your skin going greasy and/or dry)
• Foundation (like paint, the colour is usually some shade of brown)
• Powder (is just what it says, usually brownish)
• Eyeliner (pencil, usually black, to draw lines around the eyes)
• Eyebrow... liner? (pencil to draw on your eyebrows)
• Mascara (waterproof) (liquidy stuff to put on eyelashes with a brush)
• Eye shadow (powder paint in all colours, goes on the eyelids)
• Lipstick (sticky thing you put on the lips)
• Lip gloss (even more sticky, goes on top or instead of lipstick)
  

To start on top... the moisturizer isn't something I consider make up but I needed it to mix with the foundation, otherwise it would have been too strong. I bought this foundation thing, the only one I have, and ever have had, two and a half years ago and I've tried it out three or four times. It's sticky, greasy and would just take too long to get it right. I was kinda surprised it hadn't turned green yet...

The powder was fine, didn't really need it with all that stuff on my face already. Didn't wear rouge as that would just be way too much. Eyeliner... the black thing always looks weird, it's like a thin line and it shouldn't be like that. Mascara... I need a new one... The waterproof one I have (a must around here) has always been horrible so I've only used it a few times.

Today I realized why – the thing down in the.. bottle? (make up expressions - not my strong side) that is supposed to stop too much mascara coming out just wasn't there in that one. So whatever was there would attach itself to the brush and my eyelashes would glue themselves together and I couldn't really open my eyes anymore... Eye shadow.. now that was fun. I decided on brown to go with the whole foundation mess. It just looked too much but when I took it off it wasn't too bad.

It might not sound like it but the result when I was done wasn't too bad. It looked, to me at least, perfectly wearable.

Now, as if this wasn't enough, and I'm sure you've found this exceptionally interesting already, I'll list some of my own pros and cons wearing make up;


Cons:

• I don't like putting lots of goo on my face
• Takes a lot of time
• If you eat something your lip gloss disappears
• If you drink something there's lip gloss all over your glass
• When it rains it moves around (and by 'rains' I mean 'pours' cuz there's no such thing as 'a little rain' around here)
• When it's hot it moves around (hot as in warm summer day)
• If I put on / take out / move my contacts cuz they itch it might get messy
• If I rub my eyes, which I do, especially when I'm tired, mascara goes all over the place
• There's something about eye makeup that makes me incredibly tired no matter how late I slept that morning – so much for “Look fresh all day!”
• If you blow your nose you've got foundation on the paper and a white spot around your nose
• If you've got long hair it sticks to your lips
  

Pros:

• It looks nice.
• It feels great to clean your face in the evening!
  

You know... I think I'm gonna go back to doing it my way. Maybe the “tired, eyes closing and cotton in my head in the evening” only happens to me (could I found something I'm allergic to?). I don't wear make up every day but I'm not saying I never wear any. But going 'all the way' like I tried today is simply not for me.

If you love it and can't imagine letting go of your concealer or foundation or whatever magic potion it is you have then good for you! I just don't know how you do it.

Now I'm gonna go wash my face off after I've taken out the toothpicks I've used to keep my eyelids open.


Maybe she's born with it.
Believe me – she's not.

The Monogamous Kinky Lovers' Test

Wild Thing

34 Reserved, 88 Kinky

Sex is more than just physical. It is one of the ways to build an emotional bond between two people. Sex gives adults the opportunity to act like children again. You know how to enjoy kinky sex. You may have problems finding a lover equally adventurous that isn't a slut or a womanizer. But with time and affection the nicest lady and most refined gentleman can become as wild in bed as you are. Communication is the key.

I find this puzzling... I'd say most of the questions in this test were rather innocent and I don't really think anyone would say "No way!" to any of them. It asks if you'll masturbate in front of a partner, if you'll do 69 and whether you'd play with handcuffs and all of a sudden you're kinky...

Oh well... the 'you may have problems finding a lover' is true though. Not that I'm looking. Just waiting. I wonder if I'll find someone who's up for it. Or down...


Also from OkCupid!

Bite my somethingorother...

****ing unbelievable. This is fantastic.

A newletter landed in my inbox with links to five tests. I took the one that would tell me what major I should choose, seeing as I can't ever figure out if I'm doing the right thing.

This is what I got:

Psychology

You scored 16 mental chops, 8 work ethic, 15 bullshitability, and 8 practicality!

You don't mind pulling things out of your ass, but you don't want to think and you don't want to work too hard. You also apparently don't want a job. Psychology is perfect for you!

Wonderful! Why don't I just try psychology? Again?!

I did a one year course of psychology last year. I didn't get to start a bachelor degree since I wasn't in the top 4% of my class. A wasted year? Perhaps.

I do, however, resent the fact that this test says I don't want to think. Now THAT is bull shit (which I also seem to have enough of). And why should psychologists not want a job? Only a few of them go all Freud when they're done.

I did NOT like this test.


This one from OKCupid!

The Casanova Gang

Four men from Tromsø, aged 26 to 31 made a bet. They would try and see who of them were able to sleep with the most women in 2005.

One of them, a 28 year old, explains it this way: - We were sitting discussing how cheap the girls in Tromsø really are, and how easy it is to get laid in this city, if you just try. We were at a late party after the New Year celebration last year and that's when one of us suggested this competition.

-------------------------------------------------------

Radio Tromsø was allowed to send an interview with the 28 year old but afterwards he backed out. They've published some of it on their web pages.

RT: - How many girls have you had sex with so far?

28: - I'm not saying, but I think we passed 50 each as early as May and June.

RT: - How do you know your friends won't cheat?

28: - We actually discussed that and decided we trust each other and respect each other enough to be honest when we do the final count on New Years eve this year.

RT: - There are rumours about this on the town. Has it become harder to pick up women?

28: - One of us must have said something to someone. I have no idea who. But it doesn't really matter, the women I try to get with don't seem at all suspicious. It's pretty easy to get some in this town.

RT: - But the cat is out of the bag now. This interview can ruin a bit for you.

28: - You might be right about that. But I don't really care about that either. As I said, it's easy to pick someone up. I know if I'm getting any within 20 minutes.

RT: - You say it's so easy. How do you do it?

28: - Personally, I've put up personal ads everywhere on the net and I also use SMS chat. I get quite a few there. Then I'm on the town stone cold sober 3-4 times a week and it's kinda there I score the most.

RT: - And what about the girls? Do you ever think about telling them they're just a number?

28: - No are you crazy? And anyway, I just go after women who aren't very attractive. Those who are really chubby are the easiest to get to bed. They've got the lowest self esteem and are the most desperate. Actually, they should just be happy a cool guy such as myself would be bothered to sleep with them.

RT: - How often do you have sex?

28: - Some times it's really slow, but I actually managed to get five from Thrusday to Sunday sometime in June.

RT: - And STIs?

28: - Heh heh, we've talked about that too. Someone actually suggested that those who get mouldy balls are discqualified from the bet. But I guess it's up to the individual to protect himself.

RT: - And what about you?

28: - It's like 50-50 if I use a condom or not. Depends if I've remembered it or if she has in her purse or in a drawer or something.

RT: - Has anyone ever 'taken a hit'?

28: - Not that I know of. I haven't got any.

RT: - Don't you have a trace of bad conscience?

28: - For what? It's adult girls I sleep with. It's their choice and I've never forced anyone to do anything.

RadioTromsø.no

Now I guess you're expecting me to want to get those guy's heads (or other body parts) on a platter to show to the world what we'll do with guys behaving like this.

I'm not even gonna go there.

I actually don't have too much of a problem with it... Just a few things.

• I would never, under any circumstance, want to be with a guy like that. Not as in a 'relationship' (I'd run away if I ever found out) and not as in a night. I'm not a number. And quite frankly I don't think he'd be able to put up with me for hours on end just to get laid.

• They shouldn't lie. They shouldn't pretend there's 'something there' when the girl is a number.. Whether they do or not is something they'll never tell and the girls don't have a say.

• "Those who are really chubby are the easiest to get to bed. They've got the lowest self esteem and are the most desperate." I get that they do it just for the numbers, but what do they think it does to someone with 'the lowest self esteem' when someone seems to like them, then run away as soon as they've seen them naked and have done their business?

The media here has talked about this a little, it's been said that most guys do this in some form and to some extent. But this is extreme and the guys have been labelled as deviants, as having intimacy issues and as being in need of professional help.

I'm not qualified to say anything about that. And I'm not sure why everybody's going nuts over it. Many guys do this. They just don't call it a bet. That, however, doesn't mean I think it's... a nice thing to do. It's not exactly how I think sex should be.

As always, I'm torn between the 'do it and have fun' and the 'do it if you care about someone'. I usually say I agree with the first; leaning towards the second would label me as a prude. Which I don't believe I am but I'm still not able to raise myself above getting annoyed when someone calls me old fashioned.

Then maybe we are 'cheap' as the guy says. 'Cheap' or 'Prude' are the options availible to us. The women he sleeps with are with one guy and are cheap, he sleeps with a couple hundred and... guys just can't be cheap, can they? I've wondered about that for years and I'm not getting any smarter. Then again, neither are the guys.

Could that be why many girls agree to sleep with someone like that? Sure they could want to, of course they might like the way the guy looks and simply want to have a quickie. Maybe he's pushing for it, maybe she's the one who's doing that. Do all girls follow their instincts or are most of us easy to persuade? Does 'yes' sometimes mean 'I don't know'? Does 'ok' mean 'no'?


"Sleep with me and you're cheap. Don't, and you're a prude."

I think most girls have experienced a guy's defensive spikes when she turns him down. They sting.

A World of Evil

Articles...

At the abstract level it seems reasonable, if currently unfashionable, to posit the existence of universal features of humanness and thus of culture. This in turn opens up the possibility, at least as far as logic is concerned, of universal principles of justice, equity, or reciprocity as constituents of all cultures. There is, after all, no logical incompatibility between a pragmatic cultural relativism, understood as a method of understanding how the specific content of social practices or cultural forms has been conditioned by their relations to their cultural, social, and historical context, and universal or transcultural principles considered as constituents of the human capacity for culture.


What does this even mean?!?

It's from an article for the anthropology part of my global development course. How am I supposed to learn it if I can't even get a little bit of meaning out of it?

Neurotic or Psychotic?

Tight genes!

You scored 25 neuroses and 2 psychoses!

You are ideal for repopulating the species after everyone else has overdosed on prozac or blown up the public buildings. You are low on both scales and probably safe from an imminent mental illness. On the downside, your tax dollars and insurance premiums are supporting the rest of us. Cheers!


Anybody wanna help?

Want to see how you score?

Rant of the week

Sorry bout the lack of posts recently. The net here is getting so slow after the antennae-vs.-new-system fiasco, Blogger hasn't been able to open this thing up for a week. I'm also in the middle of my exams - one down, two to go. Only one month till Christmas and today is the Buy Nothing Day. Guess I'll have to get the Christmas calendar some other time...


To get to the subject...

Since I put my email address up on my profile I've been gettting lots of spam. Fortunately, Gmail puts it all in the junk folder so I've never really minded. The spam used to be exclusivly ads for Microsoft or Windows and I've been getting it for months. Common examples might be..


OEM SoftwareTop of the Line XP Software at Guaranteed L0W PRICES
Windows XP Pro $49.95, Office 2003 at 69.95 Adobe
Win XP Special Deals today 0nly
Windows software for 80% 0ff
Windows XP
Photoshop, Windows, Office


So imagine my surprise when I opened the junk box a few days ago. It had been filling up quicker than usual and curious to see what was going on, I looked and I found:


Other guys are improving themselves..are you?
Limited time special for leading enlargement product!
Hey bro, found this site
Don't be left behing- the enlargement revolution!
Don't be the "little guy" in the club
Don't be inadequate anymore!
Take advantage of special discounts now guys!


These started arriving on November 18th. Apparently I've become male again but what do you expect... Then a few days later I got some explaining the 'enlargement process' a little more carefully.


Wow check out this huge enlargement patch sale!
Massive PE patch sale
Last offer- Discount special for PE patch almost over!


-- PE? Patches? Apparently now you can buy patches, put them on your skin, and your penis will grow. How great is that?!? Just listen to this...

A top team of British scientists and medical doctors have worked to develop the state-of-the-art Pen1s Enlargment Patch delivery system which automatically increases pen1s size up to 3-4 full inches. The patches are the easiest and most effective way to increase your size. You won't have to take pills, get under the knife to perform expensive and very painful surgery, use any pumps or other devices. No one will ever find out that you are using our product. Just apply one patch on your body and wear it for 3 days and you will start noticing dramatic results.

-- This must really work because...

Millions of men are taking advantage of this revolutionary new product - Don't be left behind!

I checked out the other emails and found that, no matter the title in the subject field, it was patches they were trying to sell.

I'm also wondering if there's a new virus coming this way - 109 junk emails with a 75kb attachment have landed in my hotmail inbox the past 5 days. I usually get one or two a day so this seems a bit extreme... Of course it could just be that someone got pissed at me and gave my address out to anyone and everyone. It's happened before.

But what I find strange about these emails is the 'From' field. Usually there's some name or numbers, something that doesn't make sense, as in the patches emails. But these are different.

yahoo.com
yahoo.se
gmail.com
hotmail.com
hotmil.com
msn.com
netscape.net
t-online.no

e-trust.be
nero.com
volvo.com
fbi.gov
cia.gov

And many, many others. Subjects are usually something to do with 'password', 'registration', 'hi, I've a new email address' or 'Paris Hilton & Nicole Richie'.

There's nothing strange with this. We all get this stuff. But such an incredible amount, all starting last Monday. Then I got one from both the FBI and the CIA telling me I visit illegal websites. Needless to say, both emails remain unopened. I don't even remember signing up for anything or giving my address to anyone for a while.

Anybody else getting this?

The Lobedu rain queen

As a great magical practitioner, the queen was set apart from ordinary people, first by her sex - a woman instead of a man in an authoritative position. She was incestuosly conceived and did not die, but commited ritual suicide after the fourth initiation school of her reign. She controlled awful magic in which skin and body-dirt of departed rulers were ingredients.

Incestuously conceived. Ritual suicide. Skin and body-dirt of departed rulers.
Another job I won't be applying for...

At a more practical level, the queen was connected through marriage to all the important political officers in the tribe. As 'cattle beget children', woman-to-woman marriage is possible in Africa. 'Every Lobedu induna [headman] sends a daughter to be mothanoni [wife] of the queen as do any of the nobility who wish to be on a good foothing with her.' The queen only keeps a proportion of the many wives she recieves: others are given by her to important subjects.

Whoa wait... I can marry a woman? Or I could if I were a member of the Lobedu tribe in Southern Africa some time between 1800 and 1894. That's what Basil Sansom writes in his article Traditional Rulers and their Realms.

I'm reading for the exam on Monday in my anthropology course on Southern Africa. How am I supposed to concentrate on anything when I have shocking new information like this sneaking up on me? Then again... I wish more of the information was a little more interesting. At least then I'd have a chance of getting through, let alone remembering, half of it.

Racism with or without Religion

Curious as I am, I asked an Egyptian on Skype today whether he is a sunni or shia Muslim. I wondered which group most Egyptians belong to.

I didn't get an answer to that. I got this question;

"Do you like Muslims? Or no?"

I explained that there are Muslims who are nice and Muslims who are not nice. Just as there are Christians who are nice and Christians who are not nice. The questions continued with whether all Norwegians are good and I was told "never".

Now this is a nice guy. We don't understand each other half of the time but he says he's trying. It wasn't a "you all hate Muslims and think we're all evil" kind of reply, it was just a simple question he asked me. But it did make me think a little.

Has the Muslim become the new Black Man? Is asking questions about Islam the same as asking about the colour of your skin? Has racism evolved into religionism?

You can't talk about race, or colour or culture as I might do as I don't consider race a useful term, without being perceived as a racist. I never thought of it as a bad thing to think about somebody's skin colour, simply because that's what it is - the colour of your skin. You can be black or brown or yellow, a delicious chocolate bronze, or pinkish white like me in winter. But then there's "black/brown - different culture / Africa /African-American". If your skin has a different colour, does that mean you are different from me?

I'm all for stopping racism in any way possible. I find the whole idea of racism in itself as ridiculous as Hitler's ideas were. But that doesn't make the problem less real. I've just started to question how careful we really need to be, if I treat a black person different because they're black (I don't know what the politically correct term is these days so I'll just use black), and act real respectful because they might have a different culture even if they grew up next door from me, wouldn't that be racism in a way? Acting in a way that is based on your colour or race?


The reason I'm even digging out the topic is that it's the same with Islam these days. When race became a no-no, did we need another way to separate 'them' from 'us' and religion just seemed the obvious choice?

If you as much as mention it the other person gets defensive. I guess as a Muslim today you hear so much bad you get used to defending yourself and your religion. Explaining that you're not bad just because some psychos go around blowing themselves up. That must get quite annoying after a while. But does that mean we need to tip toe around Muslims and Islam as we might do around race related issues? Of course nobody would do that today when it's all out there and in our face every day. What about in 40 year? Will religion be something we keep quiet about so we won't offend anyone?

When did religion stop being something you're proud of and turn into something you have to defend? Is it like this with all religions these days? There are so many of us who don't have a religion. We start thinking and realize we have too few answers to make up our minds. But many have found their answers. Or never asked the questions. And they have their religion. I've defended my own views countless times, be it in discussions with Christians or Muslims.

A while ago I had a discussion with a guy who didn't believe in religion. But he believed in God and was almost - but not quite - a Christian. He said he was open minded and thought everyone should believe in what they wanted. After half an hour it became painfully clear he wasn't too serious about that. His last line before we ended the conversation stands out in my mind as how most people think these days: Islam isn't the only problem, of course not, it's some people who make it bad. They believe in God too, they are allowed to do that, to believe in what they want. They are people people like we are.

But then again...

"At least I don't commit suicide and kill people.
I'm not a Muslim."

Bushes...

"But why should we hear about body bags, and deaths, and how many, what day it's gonna happen, and how many this or what do you suppose? Or, I mean, it's, it's not relevant. So, why should I waste my beautiful mind on something like that?"

Barbara Bush on Good Morning America (March 18, 2003) discussing her son proposing Iraqi Invasion II.


Read on Sylvana's blog Renegade Mouth

Is this Winter?

It's snowing. Snowflakes touching my window. Landing gently on the ground. The city lighting up the night and snow filled clouds, coming in waves. Resting gently on the leaves still left on the trees. You never want it to stop. Snowflakes land where the wind blows them, and they stay until a rain drop comes. Landing in a snowflake's embrace, joined together for a second. The rain drop remains but the snowflake is lost for ever.


I love snow. I just don't like it when the rain comes and the world is covered with five inches of slush. I could never, in my wildest dreams, have imagined it would snow today. Yesterday there was a storm again, it was kinda bad, no wonder when they name after a nasty god. There was one like it two months ago which left two women dead after a mud slide destroyed several houses. This time one man was killed by another one. Bergen seems a dangerous place this time of year.

When I got out yesterday morning the street was a river and the cars were boats. I had a lecture and when I got back after a 15 minute walk, all my clothes were wet. Down my (waterproof) boots, my pants were so heavy when I got them off I don't understand how I could have walked with them on, even my underwear was soaked. I got out of it all and crawled into bed, reading anthropology for my exam next Monday.

The wind was incredible too. Strange to just stand and watch something like that, even if it's just a little wind. I saw it come towards me from the north, crashing into the wall and trees 20 meters in front of me, then changing directions to the west where I was standing watching it. I just stopped on top of some stairs and saw it come. It was strong enough to twist all the metal in my umbrella, not just turn it inside out but really bend it so hard I can't get it straight no matter what I do. It nearly swept me off my feet, much like I would have been if I had had to cross the street outside my building - the current in the road would have been strong enough to wash me away.

Mother nature sure is having a ball this year, the whole world over. She just gotta stop killing people. We seem to do that just fine on our own.

New Language?

You Should Learn Japanese

You're cutting edge, and you are ready to delve into wacky Japanese culture. From Engrish to eating contests, you're born to be a crazy gaijin. Saiko!

What Language Should You Learn?

I do love them languages...
But Japanese?
I knew an American girl in France who spoke Japanese...
Their signs are strange. I was thinking Spanish was next.

The Underwear Oracle

A while ago I got a negative comment on my having mentioning my underwear on this blog. I don't believe I do that a lot but I do like my underwear so I thought I'd take a test, see what my underwear says about me, and let all of you know and be as annoyed as you want.

What Your Underwear Says About You

You buy the sexiest underwear you kind find, and always have something hot on underneath your clothes. You're a closet exhibitionist who gets a thrill from being secretly naughty.

The Underwear Oracle

I don't quite agree with this though.. You are supposed to tell them what kind of underwear you're wearing right now and apparently my red thong says I'm a closet exhibitionist. But hey, fine by me. I have no problems being 'secretly naughty'...

US Citizenship Test

You Failed the US Citizenship Test

Oops, you only got 3 out of 10 right!

Could You Pass the US Citizenship Test?

Ummm yeah.. Doesn't look like I'll be coming over any time soon..

Bergen International Film Festival

As a member of 'Kinosonen' - the Cinema Zone - I was chosen to receive a VIP pass to the festival. I didn't go there until the third day but after that I saw everything I could. During five days I saw 21 movies. 22 if you count the one I saw twice.

• Sex/Life in LA
• Cycles of Porn
• The Brooklyn Connection
• For Levende og Døde
• The Norwegian Short Film Competition
• Crash Landing (x2)
• Tim Burton's Corpse Bride
• The Boys of Baraka
• Barnet
• Lost Children
• 13
• Up and Down
• The Peacekeepers
• The Women of Mount Ararat
• Skilpadder Kan Fly + Bawke
• The District
• Hundevakten
• Dear Wendy
• Murderball
• Medicine Under the Influence
• Gudenes Kamp

From Germans making documentaries about sex in LA, young American boys being sent to Kenya, the UN fighting for peace without fighting at all and the American and Canadian rugby teams in the Paralympics.

From Belgium to France, the Czech Republic to Russia, via Hungary and Kurdistan to Mexico. Back to Iraq, detour to Kenya, Uganda, Rwanda and straight to Canada and then the US. It's been quite a ride.

I think the one I liked the most was Up and Down taking place in Prague. It was sort of split in two with all the stories coming together in the end. The one half of the story wasn't much fun but the other was hilarious. The people behind me loved the animated The District from Hungary but I didn't like it as much. Then Russian Hundevakten / The Graveyard Shift (translated from Norwegian it would be Dog Watch, wonder who let them call it that...). Completely wasted.

The Mexican Gudenes Kamp / Battle in Heaven, which was the very last film I saw during the festival left me speechless. Not because it was particularly good. I just didn't understand what it was I'd been watching. It was weird, not very entertaining, just a few naked people walking around. Standing still. Lying still. When it ended I just sat there... wondering why on earth anyone would make a film like that. I didn't even understand what it was about.

That last day, Wednesday, I also went to a Panel Debate following the Canadian Crash Landing. I'll be writing something about that later, it deserves a post on its own, not to say a double page in the country's biggest newpapers. More on that later.

It's been a nice week. A lot of movies. A lot of people. I really hate to admit it but it was pretty cool have to a pass to get in wherever I wanted, not having to stand in line to buy tickets. Once when I was going to see a movie, the guy checking tickets was going to check mine, I showed him my pass and he just went "Oh! Yeah you just go on up." I got to touch upon the oh so fragile feeling of being seen as a little more important than most people just because I had that little card.

However... there was something that struck me. Although there was a row of seats reserved for VIPs and the press (I never sat there), that was it. If you're an 'important person' around here, you're not treated very differently from anyone else. You don't get to cut in the line, there's no special places for you to be, if you're the director talking about your movie you just get someone to walk you there or you stand outside with people handing out notes saying there's a debate later.

We're all the same. It just gets a little easier when people think you're someone who matters. And I pretended to be one of those for a few days. It was interesting. But rather than feeling more important than anyone else I just had the feeling I was pretending to be something I'm not.

I don't like to pretend.

Wonderful week though. Very very hectic with five movies a day for four days. There were some I wish I could have seen but I didn't manage to work it into the schedule. With five theaters and 300 shows it took a little planning to work it out. I saw much good stuff and some real bad but I'm pretty happy with my choices. I wanna go again!

What part of fall are you?

You Are Apple Cider

Smooth and comforting. But downright nasty when cold.

What Part of Fall Are You?

Apple cider. I should have seen that coming..

I'm a Monster!

Blogthings has a Monster name generator.

Your Monster Profile

Mad Hitchhiker You Feast On: Fried Twinkies You Lurk Around In: Sewers You Especially Like to Torment: Priests

What's Your Monster Name?

Priests? Yeah I could agree witht that...

On and Off

Two weeks with no internet and no network connection. Relaxing in a way but annoying when I'm unable to pay my bills. Last night a guy from the network group in the building came over to find out what's wrong. Everything had started working for everyone else a few days ago but not for me. He spent an hour poking around, saying I have too much stuff on here and feeling sorry for my computer. He found nothing and said I should delete everything and install Windows again.

I said two weeks ago, when everything stopped working, I had just installed a new antivirus, and messed around with settings to get this image onto the computer. I told him three times but he said no, that couldn't be it. When he left I called my brother to get him to send me the CD with the Windows thing on it since I don't have it here. When I hung up I deleted the antivirus and voila, everything works just fine.

I emailed the computer guy saying it was ok now and thanks for your help, and he wrote a loong email back saying he had suspected it was the antivirus. I told him about it three times when he was here, he told me that wouldn't be it, yet a few hours later he had suspected it all along. Who needs guys anyway?


So now I'm back and I have stories to tell. I just don't know where to start or what to write so I'll probably do what I always do - forget everything.

I'll just start and see how I'll do.

Missing ink

Thanks for all the birtday wishes, was a nice day and I am indeed older. It feels like I've grown up a lot the past year but it has nothing to do with age.

The net hasn't been working for over a week now, I did mean to leave another post (or ten) - Applestories turned 1 when I hit 21 so that would be reason to celebrate. I only get to check my email at the computer lab, I'm not supposed to be on here so I'll wait till my net is back up to write anything about it.

This would also be the reason why I seem to have neglected both you and your blogs. To those of you who keep asking what's going on and if I'll be back on soon - I sure hope so.

While I'm waiting for things to get fixed I'm enjoying autumn, we keep getting these beautiful sunny days with temperatures around 0. It hit the freezing point last night and this morning there was ice covering the puddles. The sky is so blue it almost hurts to look at it. I don't know what we've done to deserve it but I wish it would stay like this forever. With snow. We need snow. And maybe not forever, maybe just until April.

It's also time for BIFF - Bergen International Film Festival. I pretty much get in anywhere I want (I have a VIP pass) and I'm taking advantage of that, seeing all the movies I can squeeze in between my lectures (and tomorrow I have to skip one but don't tell anyone!). I saw one yesterday, Canadian documentary called Crash Landing. The director was there talking a little about it, my mind kept travelling far away (or not so far away) as I was watching but I liked it and I think I have the time so see it again between a lecture and a debate thing on Wednesday.

Saturday I saw two movies in the 'gay/lesbian' category on male models/prostitutes/porn stars in LA. The director was German and he was there too. Sunday there was the Norwegian Short Film... umm... thing. I liked some of them but others.. there were two that lasted about 60 seconds and we were just starting to concentrate when it was over and the lights came back on. People were just looking at each going "What was that?!?"


So I'm having fun and it seems that the net crashing (well it didn't crash, they took down an antennae and just won't put it back up) wasn't so bad after all. Kinda sucked last week when I had to do a paper in Economy and had to run back here for info we were supposed to look up, then I couldn't write it here cuz it closes at 8pm (I was up till 6am). Then a lecture at 10am and back here to send it off.

I really think that when we are required to check our Uni emails once a day, when lectures keep changing and we only know by checking our accounts, when we need the net (and not just 'should have' but the Uni says we 'have to' have access to it 'every day') then the student organization who owns and runs the building where I live, should be able to keep us online.

Well anyway, I'm off for a movie. I wish I remembered which one... I'm pretty sure it was the documentary called The Boys from Baraka. Can't wait to see it.

And four others.

It's my birthday!

My family is in town, my sister stayed over in my room. We're gonna go crash a hotel breakfast buffet, then shop till we get tired and it's time to go find the hotel swimming pool.

My mum even brought cake from home.

I'm 21!

Although that's not a big thing here.
If I were in the US I'd be allowed to drink.
That was a few years ago here. This is Europe after all.

Ooh I just got a present!

Penis, Please

"Guys name their dicks like they name their cars."

Do they? Do you? I don't. I don't have either dick nor car. I've never known of anyone who has named their penis. Then again, that's not usually something you ask people. Unless, of course, 'you' are me and I am bored with an MSN list full of contacts.

So I asked. Most people answered something along the lines of:

"What??"

At least those who don't know me very well. Those who do are used to this kind of thing by now.

In total I recieved answers from 17 guys spread around the world. I discovered guys are as likely to name their penises no matter where they live in the world. You might think since, for example, Europe and the US are more open about sexuality than much of Asia and Africa, guys from the first mentioned are more likely to name their private parts. This is not so. However, this can't be taken as representative of anything or anyone so take it for what it's worth.

I found that approximately one third of guys have named their penises. I got 11 no and 6 yes (including one Egyptian who gave his penis his own name, and one American who had girlfriends who named it but never did so himself).

I have to say I expected more guys to answer yes. And I did not expect being asked if guys really do that. Some hadn't imagined it was something one might want to do. While others said yes, sure I have. I was also surprised to find (among my contacts at least) that geography and culture doesn't matter much one way or the other.

Interesting as it was, there really should be more research done on this... Care to help me out?

Have you named your penis?
Would you mind sharing?

The War is On

I don't get angry easily. And when I'm here, I just don't have any reason to get angry. I guess little things that annoy me just pile up that way and sooner or later I have to let the steam out. Or explode. This is one of those times.

When I walked into the kitchen this morning, I found a sheet of paper taped to the wall above the sink:

YOUR MOTHER DOESN'T WORK HERE! CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF!

That was all it took. I'm furious! We have lived here for 14 months without any problem whatsoever. Sometimes there's a bit of mess in the kitchen, but never a lot. Sometimes it's spotless, although that is very rare. Then 2 months ago, in moves this guy, Pål. I asked my roommate Marte if she'd put the note up. She, like myself, suspected it was "the guy" who's done it. She said yesterday she'd found a post-it on the kitchen counter. It said something along the lines of:

CLEAN UP! DON'T WANT IT LIKE THIS. DO LIKE YOU WOULD AT HOME!

Then it had a little arrow. Pointing to some bread crumbs.

Is he out of his freakin mind?!? Who does he think he is? Going around leaving notes, what kind of chicken shit behaviour is that? Although we've lived here a year, we're perfectly aware we dont't 'live' here more than he does. We don't have any rules, he can do what he wants. But one thing is doing things your way, another is expecting the rest of us to do so too. If there was a lot of mess around here, that would be understandable. When one note comes because of two casseroles on the stove and a knife by the sink, and the other one physically indicated his dissatisfaction with our bread crumbs, well, that is going too far.

Another thing is that, as Marte put it "What, is he supposed to be perfect?". Well he's not. She said she, as I did, thought he was a nice guy when she first met him. But I don't know much about him simply because he never talks to me. Barely replies to my 'Hi!'s. First time I met him I asked him where he's from, what he studies. He never asked me anything. He doesn't seem to like talking to us. It's not easy to talk to him either. When he's in the kitchen he's wearing ear plugs. Listening to music. Apparently he's this way around everyone.

Maybe he's just a private person. But there still are things he does that are.. less than desireable. Things like when we came back here after summer he'd taken up two of the shelves in the fridge, Emas and Stines. If he knew how to count, he'd know there aren't enough shelves for each of us to have two. Details, I know, but annoying. He's only been nice to me twice. Once was just after he moved in. Second was when he needed a shelf in the freezer and there were none empty cuz Stine forgot to empty hers out when she left. Marte and I emptied two out for him and that was that.

And then the black stains. The thing is... when he's been out and it's been raining, he puts up his 'clothes drying rack thing' in the living room. We all do that when we've done the laundry. Difference is our stuff is not usually dripping wet when we put it in there. His huge black jacket, trousers and shoes are quite wet when he puts it all in there. We've all seen the puddles. He doesn't do anything about it. When they dry up there are big black stains that don't go away when you clean the floor. Maybe we should put a post-it on each stain...


I'm just furious. And Marte isn't much happier. If I'd been the one to see the bread crumble post-it, I'd been about ready to jam the second note down his throat. Actually I wouldn't mind doing that at all... Maybe I should bring my dreams of becoming a hit woman back to life. I took the second note down and Marte and I agreed to talk to him about it if we find another one. I don't know if Ema has seen them yet, she's quite the opposite of tidy and I'm certain she'd agree this is just too stupid.


If you wanna talk to me, talk to me. Don't leave no freakin notes. If you have a problem with what I'm doing, pick on me, not my friends. If that guy has any balls at all he better dig them up cuz he'll pretty soon have three angry chicks on his tail.

How to be a duck in Chinese

The visual beauty of Chinese characters is
especially appealing to us Westerners. Consider
for example, a simple word such as "duck". As
far as the word goes, there is nothing poetic
about it. It is a bird that swims around the pond
and flies away when bothered. But when written in
Chinese, it looks way better than in English. To
a Chinese, there is nothing special about the duck,
unless it is on a menu in a restaurant.

Logoi.com

Life...

My roommate is moving out next week. She's just been home for autumn break and decided to take a year off from school to be with her family. Her brother is real sick. He's been here a few times, must be about my brother's age now, 18-19ish. She said he had cancer a few years ago, did the chemo therapy, went through all that and they thought it was gone. But now it's back and it's serious, some rare form of cancer. Marte said she wouldn't be moving back home if it was something that would be alright soon. She doesn't want to leave here but she said she's thought about it and decided it was the right thing to do.

I can't imagine what they must be going through. What it's like. Cancer is everywhere these days and we all probably know someone who has it or has had it. Some recover while others... others are remembered. When a child gets something like that... I just keep wondering why. It doesn't make sense, does it? Some say there is a reason for everything. Reason, like Love, is over used. I belive in reason as in cause, not reason as in meaning. There's a cause for everything but I can't believe there is a meaning. I wish I could but... it's just not for me.

If I prayed I would but I don't so I can't.
I'll just hope. Send good thoughts.

And help my roommate move although I really hate to see her leave.


Life can be cruel some times.
I think it's time to grow up.

Bonsaieddie

A conversation on Skype. It started like this:

bonsaieddie says: Hello apples got a few minutes to chat??
apples says: I suppose I got a few...
bonsaieddie says: how are you?
apples says: I'm good thanks, how are you?

Then I decided to ask him the question I'd been asking everyone yesterday:

apples says: could I ask you a question?
bonsaieddie says: sure what is it??
apples says: assuming it's not 'bonsai', I was wondering if you happened to have named your penis?
bonsaieddie says: why do you have a name for your cunt??
apples says: nope
bonsaieddie says: what is it you would like me to do to you??
apples says: it's just a question
apples says: I heard today "guys name their cars like they name their dicks"
apples says: I'm simply trying to find out if most guys seem to name their dicks or not
bonsaieddie says: I don't name my dick
apples says: ok then

Maybe I'm a little too straightforward some times? Now that was all I wanted to say on the subjects of penises (or any other private parts) but I guess you can't just start a conversation like that and leave it. Bonsaieddie sure couldn't.

bonsaieddie says: what I'd like to do is spread your legs and lick you til an orgasm
apples says: well I doubt if that's gonna happen any time soon
bonsaieddie says: one never knows
apples says: anything can happen
bonsaieddie says: Bergen is a real nice town
apples says: yeah well...
apples says: it's a small town
bonsaieddie says: I love the car that goes up the hill
apples says: the one that goes on the ground or those that go in the air?
bonsaieddie says: the one that goes on tracks
apples says: but that's so boring...
apples says: you've been here?
bonsaieddie says: I'm there now
apples says: you're here?


Great, it's a normal conversation again!

bonsaieddie says: so that is why I said everything can happen
bonsaieddie says: since all I have is a laptop and no g/f i would gladly lick or fuck you as you wish

Oh crap...

apples says: well that's all very good

Notice the sarcasm?

bonsaieddie says: how can I get in touch with you???
apples says: aren't you in touch with me?
bonsaieddie says: so shall we fuck or not

One minute seven seconds pass as I have no yet seen what he has written.

bonsaieddie says: oh I forgot girls in Norway only play with themselves as they all are fridgid
apples says: yes of course we are
bonsaieddie says: why are you a lesbian??or just afraid to get fucked so forget it I'll try to find a normal girl in Bergen
apples says: normal? please do look.
apples says: I seriously consider an attitude change before you start though
bonsaieddie says: forget it I wouldn't want to fuck you anyway you must be as warm as an ice cube bye
apples says: good luck
apples says: I think you're gonna need it


How do I meet these people? I'm afraid I probably got myself into this one though... The results on my lil study on whether guys name their penises or not comes tomorrow.

Reckon I've tipped over the edge yet, and become a little too curious?

The story

This blog is almost one year old now. I've told a few stories and I've read many. I've started Uni, met new people, seen new places. I thought I'd share the one story that has been on my mind this entire year. It's moved on and stopped a few times. I've been up high on the clouds but I've also fallen back down to earth. This is something I haven't wanted to say yet it's all I can think about at times. This is something that might step on toes and hurt some feelings. Before it was too early. Now it is too late. This is a long one.

This is a story of the heart.


A little over a year ago I got an email. It was from a guy I didn't know, asking, very politely, if I would mind telling him a bit about this country and the people here. We kept talking for months, on and off, before he said he was coming here. He was spending a week or two outside in the freezing cold of Norway in March and I was doing my best to book plane tickets and find a hotel.

Things worked out, I flew to Trondheim and I spent a day with a bunch of guys. Wonderful day. I even wrote about it once.

He went back to the US, I went home for Easter. We kept talking. He even sent me some books he said I had to read. Which I did. March ended and April began. I hadn't seen him online for a while but that's what it's like on here. Time zones and all. A few months earlier, after we hadn't talked for a while, he sent me his yahoo IM address, AIM address, email, phone number, any way imaginable to get in touch with him. Or so I thought. We never talked on AIM and that was the only account that was online. Weeks passed and he didn't talk. I went back to using MSN and didn't know if he was on or not. How long do you wait for someone to start talking to you?

You meet then a few weeks later you never hear from the person again. Strange though... he really didn't seem like that kind of person.

So I asked. I asked my 'online people' what to do. All but two gave me the same answer. "He's a player. You've been played. That's what we guys are like. Get over it." I wrote about that too.

Reluctant to stop trusting the first person I've really ever trusted, I didn't know what to do. My advice to someone in that situation would be "It's time to move on." So I tried. I met a guy. A really nice guy. He liked me. And he knew, and asked me several times "do you still think about him?". And I said "Yes. I do."

It was June. Mid June. About time to go home for summer. I log onto Trillian and see the bright yellow light of AIM shining at me. He's still online. Or his account is. Time to ask. Time to get over it. So I tried.

"Would you mind answering one question, then you'll be rid of me for good?"

And the answer?

"My name is ____ ______...if it was mike that you were looking for..."

He wasn't there. He hadn't been there since the beginning of April. Apparently it happened suddenly. He'd been sent off somewhere. Deployed.

June was great. June was rainy. When I was in France I once thought 'The heavens are crying so I don't have to.' June was miserable. I felt trapped inside myself. There were nice times but.... When I had that AIM conversation the ground disappeared from under my feet.

I went home. Then came July. And an email.

"I have been gone for a while...
I'm back..."

I sent an email back and asked why he hadn't told me he left. Angry lil email.

"----I couldn't."

I send one back. Nothing. A few days later I'm going on vacation so I send another saying I hope he'll be around in a week. Nothing.

In August I talk to his colleague who was on his AIM again.

"He is back this week coming up--
something was wrong with him i think."

He'd been away, he'd been sick or injured, but now he was coming back. It was August.

Now it's October.

I talked to the colleague again today. Checking in after the hopeful last message that ran out in the sand. Pretty literally. He had been sick. He had been there a week ago. Now he's preparing to go back to Iraq. That's where he was before. At least that's what I'm told, I still don't know how much to trust someone like that. I don't trust easily.

How long do you wait, hope and trust someone before you move from "strong, hopeful and positive" to "naive and just stupid"? Now I know, assuming I was told the truth, that he's right there. If he wanted to he could turn on the computer or pick up the phone. Or even send a letter. Is it that I just can't take a hint? We met once and he started jumping continents to escape.

I've gone through every emotion there is. And that's fine, it's good to explore what's in your heart sometimes. But the knowing I have no right to even think any of this is horrible. Whatever I've been thinking or feeling, it's not even a speck of dust in the universe compared to what those guys are thinking, feeling and going through every day they're out there. I need to have a right to feel something. But I don't. I only met the guy once, why do I even care?

I've been wondering what to do, I've been trying to forget. Once in a while you meet one of those people who seem different. We didn't start writing so we could meet up when he got here. We didn't sit up all night talking because we might end up in bed. Could be he knew when he left we'd never meet again. Very possible. And that's fine. But I'd like to know too.

I know I'll never forget, and I don't want to. But I have to stop thinking about it or I'll go nuts. I don't trust him anymore and I don't think I can. I don't think I need to either. Because nothing of what I'm feeling matters. They're just silly little thoughts in the head of a hopelessly naive girl.

I know what I have to do now.

He might be leaving again and I have no way of knowing. One thing is he's going back out there. Another is I don't know if he thought about the fact that there were people out here who would want to know he's leaving. But I hardly think that matters. Other things are much more important. I never asked anyone to go easy on my feelings. I only ever asked for the truth.

But I do love him. And I always will. Not "in love" kinda love, but the deep one you feel for someone who matters. Someone who made a difference. Someone who made you a better person.

As hard as it is to think, it's even harder to write.

I know what I have to do.

I have to let go.

Cheney to welcome home Ohio-based Marines

CAMP LEJEUNE, N.C. Vice President Dick Cheney is welcoming home an Ohio-based Marine Corps unit that took heavy casualties in Iraq.

Cheney is scheduled to address more than 4,500 Marines this morning, including members of the 3rd Battalion, 25th Marines. The battalion, based in the Cleveland suburb of Brook Park, lost 48 Marines in Iraq and had more than 150 wounded. The deaths included 14 Marines killed in back-to-back attacks within one week this summer.

(...)

Marines who served in other units in Iraq and others who returned from helping recovery efforts in the Gulf Coast after Hurricane Katrina will also take part in the events.

Cheney will stay for a luncheon before leaving the area at about 1:30 p.m., Jackson said.

After his address, Cheney will be honored with a 19-gun cannon salute. Some of the weekend arrangements preparing for the vice president’s visit included checking that cars near the location of Cheney’s address were both swept for bombs and kept unlocked, Jackson said.

Cantonrep.com



Whoa wait a minute... Soldiers who have been on the other side of the world fighting for their lives are coming back, and it's the vice president who is being honoured? They are honouring him. He did what? Send them there?

Computers?

The net is not working. Again. So I'm at the computer lab. Again. But I won't go on about the printers this time. Or the people using them. I hate them. But they don't care.

Anyway, the Uni pages say the system went down after the power went out yesterday afternoon. But the net hasn't been working where I live since Saturday - didn't turn the computer on till 8pm so I don't know how long it's lasted. Horribly annoying when we're told we have to check our email every day for important notices. When the Uni uses the net this much for anything and everything, they should be able to keep it up a little better than this.

Then again, there is the horrible thing about never knowing if it's your computer, your connection or the whole system that isn't working. I hope it's the whole thing cuz that means they'll fix it. If it's just me, no one will know. Like in June when my net didn't work for a week then this guy came and said I'd disconnected the network. Apparently I'd done that, without knowing how to, in the middle of the night, while sleeping. I don't think the network here likes me. It tried to kick me off when I first came here a year ago, saying I had to get rid of the bug in my pc and kept sending emails all the time. Then I fixed it but it came back. We have to have antivirus and the Uni provides one (that totally sucks) but naturally I can't download that one when the net doesn't work.

Shall I continue?

What to do, what to do... There was something i was going to say but I can't remember what it was... I'm gonna print some more pages then go read. I have an exam this Friday and it's not like "40% of your grade" as I heard someone say on an American college show. Our exams are 100% of our grades. So I better study. And have lunch. I didn't have breakfast.

Oh that's true, I was gonna say something about the professor and his butt but I'll get to that later. Stay tuned!



Edit: I just found out the 'yesterday' the net went down was Friday. So it was still working 6 hours it stopped working and it was not working 12 hours after that. I'm confused.

Police raid finds 19 women held as 'sex slaves'

Nineteen women from eastern Europe thought to have been tricked into becoming sex slaves have been rescued during police raids.

A task force of female officers from West Midlands Police were sent to a massage parlour in Birmingham to free the women on Thursday.

Two people, believed to be customers, were detained during the operation, and one sawn-off shotgun recovered. Three people - a 40-year-old woman from Brierley Hill and two men who were believed to be managers - were arrested.

A force spokesman said: "The women are believed to be of eastern European origin and were tricked into the sex industry.

"They had their passports taken. They were locked into the venue during the evening to work and taken away during the day and locked in a house."

The raids took place at Cuddles massage parlour in Birmingham at 7pm.

Read the full story.

From The Independent.

Allow me to repeat one little paragraph:

"They had their passports taken. They were
locked into the venue during the evening
to work and taken away during the day and
locked in a house."

You read about women being forced to become prostitutes. You read about women who can't afford not to be a prostitute. I'm sure there are plenty of reasons why women choose this profession, and even more reasons why they're being forced into the industry. But the fact that women do their job practically chained to the bed... that's something we don't hear much about.

This happens all the time. Sex sells and not just when you put it in a music video or on the cover of a magazine. Sex is being sold and bought like any other product. It's an industry! Many women are being forced to do this. We know about it. Why aren't we doing anything?

What if these were men? What if men were being forced to have sex. I'm sure there are men who might say "yes please!" at the thought of that but seriously... If men were forced to take their clothes off and perform whatever acts the person standing over them is telling them to do... What then? I'm getting certain images of a certain prison playing around in my head.

It's just about money isn't it?
It's always about the money...

Animals and Children

As I walked to the shop today I saw a woman and a one-year old child. The child was trying to walk and I think he tried to say something, he was smiling and looking at me coming towards them and the woman looked up and smiled too. I had my ear plugs in so I didn't hear anything. As I walked past, the child kept looking at me, smiling a tiny little smile.

When I came out of the shop a few minutes later I walked past a car. The window was rolled down and a small boy was sitting inside. He said "Hello!" and smiled. I said "Hello!" back. There was a girl sitting by the other window and when she heard I'd answered she too called out "Hello!" and I said "Hello!" back to her too.

Yesterday, on the bridge, I saw the cutest little dog. A man was walking him and it was pouring down. The puppy was soaking wet and had the saddest little eyes... These past days, no matter where I go, children and animals look at me and smile. Well the animals don't smile, they just follow me with their little eyes.

That's gotta be good karma right?

*breathe*

Too. Much. Garlic.
Tongue. On. Fire.

Need. Water!

Squeek Squeek Squeek

How to start a conversation:

apples: what's that? Greg: me apples: all of you or a part of you? Greg: sorry, i forgot you don't like pics of dicks apples: you usually send out pics of your dick like that? Greg: just to people i like apples: uhh...

Upgraded

I've been upgraded. Hotmail upgraded me. Or my account. Again. Now I have 250mb. That's pretty neat.

Conversations and Conclusions

I had two separate conversations with two guys in their 20's today. I didn't have the chance to ask the first one if I could put this on here (I always ask) so it could be he's pretty pissed off right about now.

Both conversations were about love. The first guy had given up on it. The second was looking for his soul mate.

Conversation 1: The guy gave up on love after having his heart broken. He then wanted to sleep with a girl and was planning on saying "sorry" and walk away afterwards. Things got in the way and he didn't sleep with her.

Conversation 2: This guy is looking for his soul mate. He just wants a girl who is nice and has 'nice manners'. And she has to be beautiful. As the conversation progressed I found out the term nice meant she was honest, understanding and beautiful. After a while it was clear that the guy mostly wanted a beautiful girl who was nice (ie. beautiful). He also wanted smart and beautiful kids, and he couldn't have kids with an unattractive woman; then how were the kids supposed to be beautiful?

He admitted all people love their kids even if they aren't beautiful. But yes, if they were nicer he might perhaps "like them more".What if one was beautiful and one was less so (however uncomfortable I feel labeling kids that way), would he love one more than the other? Well, that he preferred not to answer.

Also, if the woman wasn't so nice, she would get jealous when he wasn't there, and she might dump him. He didn't want his kids to have a 'dumper mom'.


Conclusion?
Both guys seemed nice. The first one... he was planning on, perhaps, breaking a girl's heart, sleeping with her knowing he was going to say bye right after. Guys do that all the time, don't they? What shocked me was how he'd just gone through a painful experience and now he was planning on knowingly causing that same pain he's experiencing.

My problem with the whole thing was not 'sleeping with a girl and leaving'. It wasn't the 'causing pain'. Although both horrible things to do, it was the not wanting this to happen to yourself, but still having no problem (or perhaps not seeing the problem in) doing the same thing to someone else.

As for the second guy... He was just very honest about something everyone thinks. I've always said can you can fall for someone you don't find immediately attractive, it's just harder. Not that you have to work on having feelings for someone non-super-model looking, just that you usually start talking to someone you find attractive. I'm sure we all realize, I hope, that it's more than what a person looks like that counts (for most of us anyway).

Sometimes you just gotta be... beautiful on the inside. But how do you show someone you're beautiful on the inside if they don't want to talk to you? Maybe we should all just go around talking to everyone. I'd like that. I never talk to anyone. I'm an oyster.

More conclusion: Do to others what you want other so do to you. And DO NOT do to others what you DO NOT want others to do to you. What goes around, comes around.

Whether it's on the inside or the outside, beauty conquers all. Right? I don't know, but I for one hope it's a little more complicated than that. We're all complicated. We're all messed up in our own little ways.

I'm gonna stop with the 'beautiful' thing now, I hate even talking about it - I feel like I'm offending anyone and everyone just writing these words. Everybody's beautiful in their own way. Nothing's gonna change that. Not even stupid (read: ignorant) people.


Sometimes chatting with me is more like an interrogation than a pleasant conversation. I'm sure some of you know that. I tend to dig and ask and demand you explain yourself until you're about read to tell me to take a hike. I don't think the guys I talked would read this. I'll tell them about it and give them a chance to comment. Hope they don't mind.

Computer lab part deux

I just printed a 42 page document. Then I had 15 sheets left to print a 14 page article. But it was somebody else's document and it wasn't just a little text, it was a full page of dark grey. Now I have 13 sheets left and 14 to print.

Oh and I found the thing where you can see who's in line for the printer. I cancelled mine from this computer but I don't have access to any of the others so I can't cancel those. Can do that from the printer itself though...

I need a white sheet...

Wet 'n Wild

And wet it was...

Last night the police was calling the situation 'hopeless', water rushing into houses, cars being filled up above the steering wheel and basements being flooded. It was about to get worse.

Roads have been closed all over the city, all over the county. Two main roads down the street from here were closed during the morning. People were told to stay at home. Houses have water reaching 1.5 meters (5 feet) up the walls, people are leaving their cars and using boats to get away.

A mall is in danger of collapsing. The river has dug its way under the building; leading to one of the pillars holding it up sinking half a meter (2 feet) into the ground. One of the shops is almost completely under water.

At 2am a mountain side collapsed and destroyed five apartments. 10 people were buried as rocks, mud and water came rushing into their houses when they were sleeping. Nine people; four children and five adults, were brought to hospital. A four year old girl is critically injured and her condition is unstable. One woman was found dead early this morning.

The city already had rescue workers in the area and 75 people were evacuated. Around 100 took refuge in five houses; it's not possible to get them out yet. The 'Sivil Defence' and the National Guard were called in last night and they have managed to get food in to those who are trapped. They're not in danger any more and the police has got helicopters helping secure the area.

One woman told of hearing shouting, then jumping out of the second floor windows with her family as the rocks and water broke down the front door. Another woman was riding her bike, the water reaching above the seat.

Bergen also broke its September record for rain during 24 hours, as was predicted. We were expected to get around 100mm (4 inches) but this morning we were told the new record was 156.5mm - 6.1 inches. The last record from 30 years ago was passed a few hours - and 40 mm (1.6 inches)- ago.


Apart from a few closed roads and a lot of wet clothes, most of us got away from hurricane Maria without a scratch. Now we just have to boil our water again. They've installed a cleaning system to get rid of the Giardia parasite from a year ago, but the flooding knocked out the system and we're asked to boil our water until they can fix it.

This city is used to rain.
Bergen knows rain.
But this was some rain...

"Extreme rain and flooding"

It's raining. They're saying the gates of the heavens will open 3pm and it'll only get worse during evening until midnight. Heavy rain all night until around lunch time tomorrow when it'll go back to rain showes.

Do you see Bergen?




We're getting the leftovers of tropical hurricanes Maria and Nate. They didn't hit land in America and now they've blown their way across the ocean. They won't be too strong when they hit and they won't be as much hurricanes as extreme-record-breaking-rain-and-wind.

The Norwegian Water Resource and Energy Directorate has issued warnings for four counties, that doesn't happen often. They're saying flooding will be more likely in urban areas.

In the city they've stopped work in the streets. The workers are saying this is just what autumn in Bergen is like, but it was a little hard to keep going; the concrete was too wet and the tiles were floating away, taking on a life of their own.


I was out a while ago, had a lecture at 12:15 but no professor ever showed up. It really is pretty wet out there. I wish we'd have thunder and lightning too, that's so much fun!

Hold on to your hats people, this is gonna be a bumpy ride!

The next day

The red finally beat the blue, the score ending 88-81. The red left side in Norwegian politics will have 7 more representatives in the parliment the next four years than the blue right side.

We'll have a new prime minister before long, three red parties are joining up to form the new government and we'll just see where it takes us. Things have been changing all the time the past few elections. A few years ago, the party now 'in charge' decided kids in high school shouldn't have to buy all their books, and they gave high schools money to buy some of the books and let students borrow them, providing they pay a small deposit.

That only lasted a year, when the Christian party came into the government they stopped that and, for reasons I have yet to understand, the high schools didn't let the students borrow the books any longer, they sold them to them. I understand the money for books from the state was stopped but they could still let people borrow those they had already bought. Right? Or maybe they weren't allowed to do that.

The news reporters said what we were seeing last night was a typical Norwegian thing. Every election the opposition wins and things change. I assume we'll be unhappy in a couple years and start complaining again.

The Norway Post has just a few little numbers.


Anyway, the priest's out of the house. Focus now will be on, among other things, schools, human rights, helping others, helping our own who need it and the environment. As one of the three forming government said; Focus will on the social aspects, not on cutting taxes. The "rich people's party" Right went down all over, even in the cities where they're usually big. They still hold 20% of the votes in Oslo but they're down almost 8%. The small party Left, focusing more on farmers and the districs went up and are secured a few representatives.

The Progress party got more votes than anyone expected. I'm not quite sure what to say about them... As a guy I went to high school with said "Karl I. Hagen is our best politician. If only we could change most of his opinions, that would be great!" This is a party that wants to close the doors, so to speak, keeping everyone who's not Norwegian out. "Norway for Norwegians" is the unspoken chorus. This is a party whose voters buy houses in Spain and when reporters come to talk to them, they say it's horrible how so many non-Norwegian come to Norway and take our jobs. These are people who have moved to Spain, who see nothing wrong with themselves invading another country (and it does count as invading when they have whole towns speaking Scandinavian), but could not for the life of them allow foreigners to live in Norway.

Of course not all Progress voters live in Spain, and not all Norwegians living in Spain vote for the Progress party, but the fact that it's even possible to think that way strikes me as.. silly. The way we first heard about it was when Karl I. Hagen, Progress party leader, went to Spain to meet the Norwegians living there. This is a guy who wants nothing more than to kick all foreigners out, yet sees no problem with having thousands of Norwegians buying houses on the Spanish Costa del Sol. Because they're old. And they like the sun. Spain is Norway's Florida, and that's fine by him. But God forbid the Spainiards come here!

No you're right, I don't particularly like that party...


Too bad I didn't make a bet though, I would have won this time...

Norwegian Election Day IV

One channel said
Red 85 - 84 Blue

While the other said
Red 89 - 80 Blue

Now they seem to have compromised on
Red 86 - 83 Blue

Norwegian Election Day III

Wait... the other channel is saying;

Red left 87 - 82 Blue right

Weird...

Norwegian Election Day II

Oh no...

Red left 84 - 85 Blue right

It's tipping the wrong way...

Norwegian Election Day

Ten months ago I was up watching CNN and the US election. At 8am I went to bed after realizing the Americans (at least those who got to vote) had re-elected their president and Bush be around for another four years. And there was nothing I could do about it.

We might have a new prime minister in a few hours and this time I did help.

First a little something about elections in Norway. Apart from the dirt slinging we saw a year ago on the other side of the Atlantic, the most obvious difference is probably the number of parties. Rather than two big ones (and a few small no one seems to care about), we have plenty. I think there are about 16, but half of them are so small the news usually show 8+others, the 8 parties included in 'others' being about as large as the smallest of the other 8.

Just like in the US, it's not necessarily the person who gets the most votes who become boss. We don't even vote for people. For the first time there are two big sides, four parties on each side have become friends this year, bunching up as the socialists and the non-socialists.

The party I voted for is called something like Socialist Left and they're doing worse than last time.

The Labour party is becoming the big winner with 30,4% of the votes at the moment.

The parties on the left are red.
The parties on the right are blue.

There are 169 representatives.
Right now it's 85-84 in favour of the red.

One year ago I was hoping for blue (democrats) while now I'm hoping red (socialists). It's just as close as back then though, no one knows what's gonna happen yet. I'm thinking I should make a bet with someone - I lost last time but, looking back, paying up afterwards was one of the most pleasant experiences I've ever had.

Fame

Simo from Morocco mentioned he'd like to be famous. Why?

"well i dont have a good reason
i think to be famous is better but i have
never try that to see if that s right or not"


Do we all have a secret desire to be famous? Something most of us don't really want to admit to ourselves and couldn't tell anyone else? Something that's fun when you're a kid but when you grow older you're supposed to... grow out of it?

Would you be happier if you were recognized when you were walking down the street? If everybody wanted to talk to you and take your picture. If you were invited to all the great parties and knew the coolest people?

Maybe people would know you because you did something good. Maybe you've written a book, or been in a movie. Could be you're standing up for things you believe in and people admire you. Or you signed up for a reality show and they all know your face.

Happiness comes in all shapes and sizes. Just like people do. Some think of fame as having your face on tv, others as something that may come when you've worked hard and made a difference. Some like it, some don't. Some have it, some want it. Some wish they'd never tried it.

We all want to matter, to make a difference. But do you want to matter to the whole world or to the people who really know you? Do you want people to know you because they know who you are and what you've done, or because they've seen your face before?


One thing most of us do have in common though. Whether it means fame or family, friends or fans, chances are you are happiest where everybody knows your name...

Do not stop

Drunk driving in Bergen

Borrowing stuff

Somebody drank all my milk.
Or, I strongly suspect, one of my roommates used it to make porridge.
I mean... you think you can use a carton of milk, then put it on the counter and no one will notice? I'm perfectly ok with them all to borrow my stuff and then replace it. But;

1) ask
2) if you can't ask, tell the person you borrowed from about it afterwards, leave a note or something of the kind
3) don't use it all when it's something like milk, not on a Sunday when the shops are closed
4) replace as quickly as possible


A few months ago I had that problem, but the other way round. I'd buy milk, or something else, then not remember if it was mine or not so I had to ask the others before I used it. Then I put a red marker in the kitchen drawer so I could put a dot underneath things. Not to make the others not use it (doubt if they'd see it), but so I'd know if it was mine or not. I haven't done that since I came back after summer but I was going to a couple days ago cuz I'd started forgetting what was mine again.

But the red marker's gone too.