The Guy With The Latex Sheets

A couple years ago I was at work at the mall in Bergen. I walked past some guys, one had a microphone in his hand and wondered if he could ask me some questions. I didn't have the time, I had to hurry back to work.

I walked up the stairs and the guy came running after me. He seemed nice, if a little pushy and a bit older than me. His microphone was shoved in his back pocket. When we got to the shop he said he needed some help. He was looking for sheets, you see.

Sheets. Right. We had plenty of those. He asked if we had any in latex.
"You know, because things can get a bit messy sometimes" *wink wink*. Yeah... no sorry, we didn't have any of those. At that, he made a flirty comment I can no longer remember, and left.

I thought of that guy again today when I was reading a post on a Norwegian blog about sex toys, body paint, massage oil and the like. The oil always seemed so messy to me - how do you manage to play around with the sticky stuff without leaving stains all over? The solution may be getting a latex sheet.

It is kinda hard to be spontaneous if you have to change the sheets before you start though... anybody got any better ideas?

As for the guy, I saw him again a week later. He was jogging past the building where I lived as I came outside. He stopped fifty yards up the road, just outside the window of the apartment, bent down and fiddled with his shoes until I'd passed him, which was when I recognized him.

I'm sure if he lived in the neighbourhood I'd seen him many times before.. it only took a microphone and a few comments about latex sheets for me to notice him (I wouldn't recommend that as a pick up line though, it probably won't have the desired effect!).


Or who knows, maybe he was a secret agent spying on me from the place I worked and outside the apartment. He probably had a tiny camera and binoculars with him, and there's a thick dossier on me on someone's desk somewhere...

A jogging latex spy.
I like!

Changing Perceptions of Normality

It's a happy day for Norwegian transvestites.

The Directorate of Health has decided to remove transvestism, sexual fetishism and sadomasochism from its list of disorders and diagnoses.

The Director of Health says their goal is to change the idea that certain sexual preferences and identities can be seen as illnesses. Homosexuality was a diagnosis in Norway until 1979 and changing perceptions is a very slow process.


A simple search on google reveals a lot of people seem to mix the terms transvestite and hermaphrodite (recently replaced by the term intersexual). This can possibly be done deliberately by some to sell access to their sites, or it could simply be ignorance. It never ceases to amaze me how those who are the most hateful are often the most ignorant among us..


Either way, I admire those who are different and dare express it - I may not understand half the fetishes out there, I may not want wish to be a transvestite and I may never have tried out S&M.. but that certainly doesn't mean anyone should be labeled as having a disorder simply because they like lace panties or enjoy a good spanking once in a while.

Norway's changed, who's next?

Hairy Dog

I find myself avoiding this blog.

If I decide to write a post, it would mean having to think, write and actually form sentences. Then I'd have to go through all my photos on a tiny little laptop, to find the two I want to actually present to the world. To illustrate my point.

I don't have a point.
Not yet anyway, they're all jumbled together, looking like those hairy dogs that have hair in front of their eyes at all times. I feel like one of those dogs right now.

A little more than I'd like to admit, actually.

Autumn - while waiting for spring

My favourite photo from October.

I loved how the flowers stood their ground for weeks, born from bud to flower when it should have been too cold, when reason said they should have frozen. They grew, sensing winter coming, not ready to give up their colours but holding their little heads high.. before finally succumbing to the frost, the cold and the darkness.

Norwegian what?

I heard a new term today and innocent as I am I expected it to be something nice, something clean, something... innocent.

Norwegian nasty - When an erect male penis is inserted into a female's ass, and afterwards the male proceeds to receive oral sex from the woman.

I just gave that girl a mean Norwegian nasty.

Urbandictionary.com seems to have a lot of terms starting with "Norwegian" these days;

Norwegian culture - A perfectly valid excuse for punching someones testicles.

Norwegian massage - a woman massaging another woman without using her hands

Norwegian goggles - An act of shame committed upon a passed out person, where the perpetrator places his hairy naked scrotum upon the closed eyes of the victim. This must be performed while facing the victim's feet, so that the penis will naturally fall upon their nose in a manner resembling the nose guard of traditional viking helmets.

I'm sensing a theme here...

The Mysterious Jeans

My mother came storming down the stairs and into my room a few days ago. She was all serious like and demanded to know if I'd had a guy in my room the previous night.

Now, you may wonder what brought this on, as I did, since my parents are not very likely to mind if there had been a guy in my room. But there had not. Then where did the jeans come from?

My mother had been folding clothes when she found a pair of jeans which did not belong to anyone in the house. Whose were they? The most entertaining solution my mother could think of was that there had been a guy in my room and I'd kicked him out in the middle of the night.

I said that might have been fun, but sorry, it didn't happen. My mother did not give up, instead she asked if this guy was someone I didn't want to see again (or admit to be seeing). I told her the truth,

"Mum, I think that if I'd kicked a guy out in the middle of the night, without his pants on, in half a meter of snow and -17C (1.4F), it's more likely that he's the one who won't be wanting to see me again."

At that, she could no longer keep a straight face. She did really wonder where the jeans came from though, perhaps we have a flasher in our midst?

2010

Since last..

• December
• Baking cookies
• Gingerbread houses
• Decorations
• Family
• Christmas
• Snow
  
• Presents
• New Year

That's about it.

Currently I'm a little bummed out to find there's a show about the most important economic news in Norway of the past year.

And just bummed out in general about life.. in general.

2009 wasn't all that, 2010 is a brand new year full of blank pages.
I wonder what I'll fill them with.

I sold my soul and got an iPod

No, of course I didn't, what do you think of me?


But I came close - the iPod Touch is rather gorgeous, and I do still want an iPhone.


If it wasn't for the whole locking it to one (or two) operating systems, not being able to connect it to the eee, having to install stuff, and not being able to use it whenever, wherever...


In case you're one of those who think "apples" comes from Apple, you're sadly mistaken. apples came about before I'd ever heard of Apple. Probably before I'd used a laptop and long before I owned a cell phone or an mp3-player.

I'm not too fond of the company's policy, which is looking more and more like that of Microsoft - it's not enough to get the costumer to stop by for a visit, you need to lock them in your attic until they scream for mercy. Well. That's how I think of it some times.


Still, in spite of my fondness of freedom and commitment phobia, that iPod Touch does look damn good...

Creative Zen X-FI2

I'm in love again!

With a Creative Zen X-FI2 mp3 player, 32gB storage space and a touch screen.

The screen is 3'', perfect for watching movies, with a battery that lasts up to 25 hours.


Only sucks it's a bit too expensive, what with me not having the greatest record of keeping mp3 players alive for too long at a time...

China Fashion Week 2009 - Timeless Fashion?

This is an actual outfit from the China Fashion Week.

I'm not quite sure what's the front and the back, but I it looks like this is the right way (whatever that means).

Maybe an idea for those of us who never seem to be on time?

More weird looking outfits ->>