Saturday, February 28, 2009

The Political Compass

I always figured I was pretty liberal and on the left side somewhere, turns out I wasn't too wrong.

Look at that... I'm practically the Dalai Lama..

Economic Left/Right: - 5.25
Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: - 6.67


What are you?

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Youth Model Shotgun

Jordan Brown, an 11 year old boy from Pennsylvania killed his stepmother in their own home last week. An 11 year old killing someone is shocking enough, but what really blew me away was something ABC News reported today; the boy had "used his own youth model shotgun, a smaller-sized gun designed specifically for children."

I get that Americans have very different laws when it comes to guns compared to us Norwegians, but a "youth gun"? According to AOL, the gun, a "youth model 20-gauge shotgun" had been given to the boy by his father for Christmas. Less than two months later the boy used it to kill his father's girlfriend.

According to OCShooters.com, children should have guns for "shooting at targets, plinking at tin cans or starting to train for the Olympics." This of course makes it absolutely necessary to make guns especially for children. So even their little fingers can pull the trigger.

To quote blogger X Curmudgeon;
"What the hell is a youth model shotgun? Who would give an 11-year-old a shotgun? More insanity from the gun lobby. Why not make it legal for him to drink whiskey (a youth model) while we're at it."
What is it they say... "guns don't kill, people kill people".
Well stop giving people guns then!

If you're too young to make a life, you're too young to take one.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Job Interviews

Have you ever been to a job interview and been a question you thought was just a little too personal? I'll (hopefully) finish school in a few months and I'm guessing there are a few interviews in the not too distant future. But I don't think I'd ever be ready for questions like these;
  • What kind of gravestone would you pick?

  • Could you imagine wearing a dress once a week?

  • What kind of birth control do you use?

  • Do you know a lot of dirty jokes? Someone who can't tell dirty jokes is too sensitive and won't fit in here.

  • How much weight can imagine losing? What does your plan for that look like?

  • Can you handle a shotgun?

  • Oh, you sing? Could you sing something for us?

  • Have you tried amphetamine many times?

  • When you get angry, do you ever feel to hit whoever you're angry with in the mouth?

  • Do your parents still live together, and why?

  • Why are you still single?

  • What kind of tree would you be, and why?

  • Do you know how to handle a broom?

  • Which side of the bed do you prefer to sleep on?


Others prefer not to ask questions at all;

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

heardontv.com

I heard a song on TV. It got stuck in my head. It would NOT get out.

Have you ever tried finding a song from a TV show when you didn't know much about the show and you couldn't understand any of the words?

Luckily I have. Plenty of times. And I found it. Bones, S02E14 - Look After You by The Fray.

Thank you heardontv.com!

Obama's Elf



Thanks Timotab!

Oh poor baby...

Sexy American City Names

(I'm feeling childish today... :)
"Where ya from?" "Gaylordsville. Yeah, I'm a ..Gay..lord... err..."


  • Three Way (AZ)
  • Bald Knob (AR)
  • Gay Meadows (AL)
  • Fort Dick (CA)
  • Gaylordsville (CT)
  • Fluffy Landing (FL)
  • Hooker Point (FL)
  • Climax (GA)
  • Ball Club (MN)
  • Climax Springs (MO)
  • Licking (MO)
  • Dicktown (NJ)
  • Horneytown (NC)
  • Lizard Lick (NC)
  • Pussy Creek (OH)
  • Fertility (PA)
  • Scotrun & Puseyville (both PA)
  • Lick Creek (TN)
  • Sweet Lips (TN)
  • Nipple (UT)
  • Virgin (UT)
  • Threeway (VA)

5 Random College Related Facts

  1. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.

  2. 9 US Presidents never attended college. 25 were [sorta] lawyers - some never quite finished law school (Andrew Jackson, Theodore Roosevelt, Woodrow Wilson, Harry Truman). James Garfield was actually shot dead by a lawyer (and I thought it was usually the other way round...).

  3. In the US, the average annual wage for someone with an advanced degree is $74,602, bachelors degree; $51,206, high school diploma; $27,915, without a high school diploma; $18,734. (students within 'the Humanities' (read: Development Studies and the like) end up at the lowest end of the scale. People who study poor people are poor.... that kinda makes sense.)

  4. 27% of U.S. male college students believe life is "A meaningless existential hell."

  5. On average, 100 people choke to death on a ball point pen per year. (and that has nothing whatsoever to do with #4!)

Morality

Your morality is 0% in line with that of the bible.

Damn you heathen! Your book learnin' has done warped your mind. You shall not be invited next time I sacrifice a goat.

Do You Have Biblical Morals?



I have never been more proud!

Monday, February 16, 2009

Gay marriage



People are idiots...

The Eurasian Lynx

The Eurasian Lynx (or lynx lynx) is found all over Norway, although rarely in the western counties. Maybe that's why I never really thought of it being out there - it just hasn't been an issue where I'm from.

A couple months ago though a man found tracks not far from our house, and in the town next to ours they have started hunting for them.

This weekend they tracked one from Friday until Sunday when they found it and shot it dead.

They're absolutely beautiful animals and it's strange to think about them walking around in the mountains where we all go hiking during summer. I'm not sure exactly how I feel about humans going out to kill them, the lynx does kill a lot of sheep and I understand both the emotional and the financial side to wanting to control the population.

Still though...

Sunday, February 15, 2009

I know I've posted too many of these, but I just had to!

[jaygo83 enters chat]
jaygo83: big fat pig
apples: wow that's nice of you
jaygo83: are you upset now
jaygo83: was gonna say wanna chat, got cam,, how boaring so instead hello bog breath bet you have an ipod, Nintendo wii eat burgers smell like an ash tray, have no credit in your phone because you have sent too many texts and used blueteeth, if you have humour reply but don’t bother swearing or being vulgar.
apples: not particularly :)
jaygo83: where you from stinker
apples: I think I'm gonna pass on you
apples: bye bye
jaygo83: piss off then
jaygo83: boring old cow go and get the pidos they are more your scene

Lee Redmond and the Worlds Longest Fingernails

Living in Salt Lake City, USA, the woman had not cut her nails since 1979. The shortest was, according to Wikipedia, 71.6cm (28.2 in), the longest 80cm (31.5 in).

Apparently the nails did not prevent her from performing ordinary tasks around the house or caring for her aging husband suffering from Alzheimer's.

Tuesday this week the woman was in a car accident and all her nails broke. Her injuries were serious but not life threatening.



Two thoughts;
- How does anyone manage to get nails that long?
- Why would anybody want to do that??

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Valentine's Day Fun Facts on Love

On average, a human being will have sex more than 3,000 times and spend two weeks kissing in their lifetime.
(that's once a day for only 8.2 years!)

Experts insist that the average person falls in love seven times before marriage.

On average, a woman kisses about 79 men before getting married.

Your lips are 100 times more sensitive than the tips of your fingers. A real kiss quickens your pulse to 100 beats a minute.

Men who kiss their wives every morning before going to work live 5 years longer than all others.
(they are also more successful in business, more hard working, and earns more money)

* 2 out of 5 have married their first love.
* Only 4% asked the parents' approval for their bride's hand.
* 1 in 5 men proposed on his knees.
* 6% propose over the phone.
(wonder how many said yes...)


...and for the cynics out there...

Love was originally invented by Microsoft, thus explaining its chronic instability.

Eight out of 10 women in their twenties fear that they will never find a soulmate.

72% of men admit to fantasizing about their workmates.

The worst place for love and romance to survive is the United States - Americans hold the record for the highest divorce rate in the world.

With the increasing use of Internet dating, rates of both casual sex and divorces increase.
(I can only attest to the accuracy of the first..)

You may have thought it was just a turn of phrase, but no. It's official. Love makes people crazy according to researchers at the University of London. For starters, falling in love causes serotonin levels in the brain to drop, causing obsession. Then it increases production of cortisol, a stress hormone that causes high blood pressure and potential loss of sleep. And to make matters worse, when we look at our new loves, the neural circuits that control social judgment are suppressed, which may explain the phrase "blinded by love."
(good thing then that sex releases hormones that make you relax!)
(come to think of it, I could use a little crazy right about now...)


In Ancient Greece, pederasty, a same-sex relationship between an older man, known as the erastes, and a beardless boy, the paidika became a cultural ideal. The relationship would end once the boy reached puberty.
(oh eww gross!)

Friday, February 13, 2009

To the point

mr.dick: do u have msn?
applestories: yes, but I won't add you
mr.dick: but we can have funny
mr.dick: i think u can add me

applestories: why the nick?
mr.dick: becaouse i have big dick
mr.dick: :)
mr.dick: will u give ur msn address?

Friday, February 06, 2009

Happy Hardcore



It hurts, make it stop!

Seriously, why would anybody put themselves through this?
- according to Akaí; "cause... it´s pure awesomeness?"

*love* the pic though!

Alfred is dead!

To: All students
From: IT Department, University of Bergen
Subject: Alfred is dead

Alfred the server is dead and cannot be brought back to life.

All services have now been moved to different servers.

In the mean time we're having fun
shovelling snow!

More chat

NiceSpanker25M: Hi, do you like spankings?
apples: can't say I've tried it much
NiceSpanker25M: lol
NiceSpanker25M: you just gotta love when a girl says that
NiceSpanker25M: because it means
NiceSpanker25M: "I would like to try it!"
NiceSpanker25M: lol
apples: see this is why girls get raped - we say one thing and the guy just knows we mean something completely different :)
NiceSpanker25M: Nope thats not true thats just what guys who dont get it think
NiceSpanker25M: ask a girl something sexually and shell say
NiceSpanker25M: "Helllllllll NOOOOOOOO you freakin pervert!!!!!!!!"
NiceSpanker25M: if she means "no"
NiceSpanker25M: and if she means "yes"
NiceSpanker25M: shell say
NiceSpanker25M: "Maybe"
NiceSpanker25M: trying to be mysterious girl and all
NiceSpanker25M: lol
apples: you know, it really is guys like you who are the scariest
apples: doesn't matter how honest we are, you'll "know" we mean something else anyway
NiceSpanker25M: because I understand whats going on?
NiceSpanker25M: lol
NiceSpanker25M: lol
apples: because you think you do
apples: and nothing can change your mind


Why do guys do this and how can we change it?

Thursday, February 05, 2009

My flatmate...

...snores a little.

It's actually kinda nice, especially when we haven't seen him for a few days - it means he's home. And alive. We've been a little worried a few times...

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Chat is to Sex as MSN is to Condoms

Did you ever realize the similarity between being on chat and being in bed?

On chat:
Do you have msn?
Yes I do xxx@xxx.com
I added you. You're not on.
Yes I am...
Let me try....
I don't see you
Try and add me zzz@zzz.com
I added you
Oh yeah...

In bed:
Do you have a condom?
Yeah.... Can't seem to...
Did you get it?
Wait...
Here, I'll try....
Ok... Roll it on.....
Yeah I got it...
Almost... like that....
Oh yeah...


You have a good thing going, then you start messing around with formalities and before you know it, it's more like a business transaction than a hot, passionate affair.

Don't get me wrong - condoms are a must!
- and kids, don't do drugs! -

We've got an intruder

The past few weeks a man has been walking around the corridors of the student apartment building here at Gyldenpris, asking girls to borrow their computers to find a friend's address, or using other excuses to get inside their rooms.

A couple weeks ago he followed a girl into the laundry room and asked her "personal questions which were none of his business". According to an article in a paper today we're supposed to be worried. Especially girls and new students.

I can't say I'm feeling particularly scared at the moment, more like I wonder what he looks like, and if I met him I'd like to ask him "oh you're that guy, aren't you? And what exactly do you think you're doing here?" But maybe that's just me...

Either way, hopefully the newspaper, the radio and the tv coverage this has got (and I have to say "well done" to the guy (in the pic) who took over as student representative while I was away) must have scared the guy off. Probably for the best - no one wants to be trapped in the basement by a creepy guy...

Working together - winter pics

During Christmas my sister and I found out that working together works best - even when taking photos.


...........
No flash ....................................Flash....

Working together


For the last one we used my sister's camera to make the flash, and my camera to take the photo without actually using the flash on that camera.

Of course, if either of us had a proper camera like real photographers do, we wouldn't have needed to mess around like that. Then again, neither of us are photographers and we did had fun, so I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Black is the new Blonde: Camilla Fors from Charterfeber lost her purse

"It was like someone said before that they'd lost their child like three years ago, just like by accident on the street. And yeah they found it but.. And they panicked. That's what it was like for me now. Because my purse is like my child."


And this was before she started drinking.
Which, incidentally, won't be shown on TV since she, although claiming to be 18 in order to join the show, is in fact only 17 and too young to drink. Legally at least.

Monday, February 02, 2009

Africa According to the Rest of the World



Oh those Americans...

From GraphJam, via Joe in Uganda

Bank turned sexist?

According to the Bank of England, it is very important for women to wear high heels and make up to work - otherwise they might not be seen as professional, write newspapers Independent and Dagbladet. A memo leaked from a meeting Wednesday last week states, among other things;

"Look professional, not fashionable; be careful with perfume; always wear a heel of some sort – maximum two inches; always wear some sort of makeup, even if it's just lipstick [...].

"Shoes and skirt must be the same colour. No-nos include ankle chains, white high heels; overstuffed handbags; an overload of rings, and double-pierced ears"[...].



I have to say I completely agree with the Bank on this; I never feel competent to do any sort of job when I'm wearing flat or white shoes...

My sweater smells like France.

My dark blue, soft, cosy woolen sweater smells like France today.

I have no idea how that happened, but I love it!

Does swearing increase pain?

In Møre og Romsdal, a Norwegian county, a woman had been in labour for hours when she uttered a phrase which may be translated into English as;

Fucking hell, it's so fucking painful!

The midwife then came up to her, bent down and told the woman no swearing would be tolerated in the delivery room, and she had better behave as she was told.

"Lying there calling upon the Devil will only bring more pain, and then I deserve a difficult birth. But if we want to, we could turn to someone else and all pray to him together. Then it might go well after all," the woman remembers being told.

It wasn't the only mistake the midwife made, and the authorities have started looking into it.


You're in more pain than you can ever imagine. When you once, one time, express your pain you're told that your choice of words means you don't deserve any better - and this by the person who is supposed to help you get through it. And then they ask you to pray?

I don't know which of those would offend me more...

Sunday, February 01, 2009

Lunatics Online

I've been chatting since I was 12, half my life - for my generation it's as natural as talking to someone on the phone. Maybe even more natural - we text more than we talk anyway. But there are people who don't get it, and I come across them from time to time.

I'm not talking about the "Wanna cyber", the "got cam, u wanna c" or even the "check my cam baby, wanna see u get off on my hard cock". True, those aren't very inventive (and even less tempting), but they are expected, they're "normal" on here and usually, although not always, they go away if you're not interested.

And there are the people you've talked to for a while. Those who make the net such a great invention. People you can have interesting, deep conversations with the one day and a 30 second "I'm so mad right now, I just need to vent, why are people so stupid??" the next. You've started to learn how the other person communicates and it just works. In real life that would be called chemistry, and I guess you can have that online too.


But then there's another kind of people. The kind who, had it been real life, you'd have been out on a few dates and liked each other, things seem good, then suddenly he starts yelling at you because you answered your phone, or said 'thank you' to the guy who gave you back your change, claiming you're flirting with everyone right in front of him.

Online this jealous behaviour manifests itself in the only ways it can when there is no face to face contact - an obsessive need to be seen and heard, to be your priority at all times, never having to wait more than two seconds for a reply, and constantly questioning you about who you're talking to. The difference between a conversation in real life and on MSN seems completely lost on some - if I've known you for a week and you showed up on my door every day, demanding to spend the evening with me, saying I can't talk to anyone else, and not letting me change the cd, make dinner, or even go pee... If you did that, you'd be a stalker and a psychopath.

Why do some people believe this behaviour is acceptable online? Why do I get accused of being selfish, never thinking about others, not a nice person, "I don't deserve to be treated like this", "you'll get yours in the end" and, of course, the inevitable; "no wonder you're single, no one could ever stand being with you".


I know some would say of course people here are like that, everyone chatting online are losers, have no social skills and on and on, but I disagree and I know that;
1) I *am* a nice (although strange) person.
2) Most people are actually nice.
3) Some people are freaks no matter where you meet them.
4) And they're never gonna change.


Doesn't matter if you meet them online or not, it's just easier for someone to hide the fact that they're a complete lunatic when you never actually *meet* them...