Norwegian what?

I heard a new term today and innocent as I am I expected it to be something nice, something clean, something... innocent.

Norwegian nasty - When an erect male penis is inserted into a female's ass, and afterwards the male proceeds to receive oral sex from the woman.

I just gave that girl a mean Norwegian nasty.

Urbandictionary.com seems to have a lot of terms starting with "Norwegian" these days;

Norwegian culture - A perfectly valid excuse for punching someones testicles.

Norwegian massage - a woman massaging another woman without using her hands

Norwegian goggles - An act of shame committed upon a passed out person, where the perpetrator places his hairy naked scrotum upon the closed eyes of the victim. This must be performed while facing the victim's feet, so that the penis will naturally fall upon their nose in a manner resembling the nose guard of traditional viking helmets.

I'm sensing a theme here...

Tempting Offer

What do you do when your ex wants you to come by his place of for a bit of fun tomorrow?

Alright, I admit it; when a girl says she misses blow jobs, I guess you gotta expect some offers..

But what do I do?
He looks way better than last time; I look worse. I don't want this to be one of those "man, am I glad to be rid of her or what?!" I'm a little too proud for that.

Of course... I was the one who suggested it... although not exactly as directly as that...



edit: But what if things start feeling different? I'm alright with the way we left things, I really don't want to mess it up. I don't want to start rewriting history... Maybe I should just find someone totally new. Or better yet - someone I just haven't ever thought of in that way yet. That should be better... right?

Bushy

I'm actually thinking about volunteering..

Blown away

I was talking to a guy I met last summer who said

"...you gave me the blow job of the century"


Although, yes, I do realize he only said that to make me feel hot and want to see him again, it did feel like a nice compliment now that, after four months with the same guy (without freaking out) I am starting to lose my inspiration.


Have you discovered a new technique?
Found a revolutionary way to please your guy?
Got any brand new blow job tips you want to share?

Or is the old "wet, lick, suck and wank routine" still good enough?

Anniversary

It has now officially been one year since I had sex.


It's tragic!


Not in the sense that "oooh everybody should have sex all the time!". You should know me better than that. I mean in the sense that I want to, I have wants, lusts, desires, I want to feel a body next to mine and a hard cock in my mouth. Sorry if honesty offends you but I never claimed this blog was family friendly.

Not entirely sure what to do about it though... I've thought of becoming a nun. Supposedly they don't have sex but I'm quite certain they have some wicked orgies in those convents of theirs...

Until then I'm still looking for volunteers to help me out of my involentary celibacy.