It's been a while.
It's summer (or so they say). It's been raining all of July. But June was nice. The rain started when I got a job so I can't do anything but assume it'll stop when my summer job ends.
I'm selling pillows, duvets, carpets and other related items. I've suddenly realized there are so many things I should, but don't, have - such as a new pillow (a little harder than the old one), new bed sheets (haven't got around to putting them on), a lot of pillows for the common room (they're still in their bags) and... well, you get the picture. Boy does that 30% discount come in handy...
I haven't been home yet, hoping to squeeze a week in after Uni has started and my job ended. I'm told my brother has got a job this summer as well (need to get him onto my other MSN account, I never talk to him anymore).. hope to see him before summer ends. We both live in Bergen but never meet. Kinda miss talking to him.
Now.. The Guy bought an apartment and I'm helping (a teeeeny bit) with the... well.... fixing it. It was broken. In the way apartments can be broken. His parents were here for a couple weeks and did most of it. Yesterday he and I put together most of the kitchen cabinets and drawers (an endless amount of drawers). Even got to open up the fridge and look inside (those puppy dog eyes of mine are quite useful at times). I think he got quite annoyed with me by the end though.
And I've stepped on a snail. The brown ones are everywhere, not just when it's raining. It's crazy. Last night I was walking home some time after midnight. I thought "Wow, it's really dark these day... even with no clouds." Then, of course, I started looking up at the sky to see if there really were no clouds (there weren't, I'm pretty sure) and I felt this... strange sensation. Almost as if I stepped on an egg (not that I've ever stepped on an egg).
Not knowing what it could be, I took another step and tried to 'brush' it off, then I saw the remains of a snail on the ground. Naturally, I knelt down and whispered 'I'm so sorry' (no I wasn't drunk!), then my next thought was "ewww I got snail remains under my shoe!", then spending the rest of the walk home trying to get it off.
- For one thing, I now know I've never stepped on a snail before... not this summer anyway.
- My TV is dead. Or rather, in a coma. It just stopped working one day, The Guy and I borrowed his parents car and brought it to the shop, they fixed it (or so they say) and now I need to find a way to get back there and get it. It's a little far from the bus stop (too far to carry a big tv - The Guy said he didn't understand why I didn't have a flat screen, at least they are 'carryable'). I need a car. Pronto!
On a more serious note, today I watched the last episode of The Bachelor - Rome. How can a reality show be serious, right? I know, but with a couple glasses of wine inside and a nice bachelor for once (I've only watched half of one season before and he turned out to be a jerk), and two really nice girls, I got kinda sad for the one who lost - even if I knew he'd pick the other one.
What's serious is that completely without noticing it I've gotten to the point where I'm over the guy from two years ago. I know, two years, waaaay time to be over him. But since he wasn't 'real' and just disappeared into thin air, he was more like a dream than real life. I'll never stop trying to find out what happened to him but I know he's not... I know I'll never again say "but I love him...." (I know, silly, I never knew him).
I'm over him. It's been two years. I guess I needed it, it'll make me stronger. It's a relief to know I've let go.
Which brings me to The Guy. We've been going out for almost a year. I care for him deeply, I can't imagine what my everyday life would be without him. I'd be alone and lonely again. But I'm not in love with him. No butterflies. He knows, I'm not trying to trick him into anything. But since he's a little older than me there's always the "he's probably at the age where he wants to settle down where I still have a few years"-dilemma.
If I were going out with someone who didn't love me and I loved them, then they say they care about me but it might be best we just be friends... I wouldn't want to see them dating others. I wouldn't want to know they were sleeping around. I couldn't handle knowing he was falling in love with someone else. How can I do to someone the things I don't want to have done to me? I don't want to leave him, and I hope he won't leave me. But when and where do you decide what is more important - to be with someone you like and care for and have fun with and are on the same level as - or finding someone who gives you butterflies? I have time.. I just don't know if he does.
....and that's what summer has been like. I've got a job, met nice people, spent most of June on the balcony and most of July in my rubber boots and umbrella. It's starting to look a lot like autumn and there are only 5 months left of the year. I'm dreading the start of a new semester and I'm missing home, the hammock under the cherry tree - and the kitten.
At least it's not long till Christmas!
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Squirrel Spy Ring? Thats Nuts!
Police in Iran are reported to have taken 14 squirrels into custody , suspected of spying.
The rodents were found near the Iranian border allegedly equipped
with eavesdropping devices. The reports have come from the official Islamic Republic News Agency (IRNA).
When asked about the confiscation of the spy squirrels, the national police chief said: "I have heard about it, but I do not have precise information."
The IRNA said that the squirrels were kitted out by foreign intelligence services - but they were captured two weeks ago by police officers.
A Foreign Office source told Sky News: "The story is nuts."
But if true, this would not be the first time animals have been used to spy. During World War II the Allied Forces used pigeons to fly vital intelligence out of occupied France.
More recently, US marines stationed in Kuwait have used chickens as a low-tech chemical detection system. It is also well documented that dolphins have been used to seek out underwater mines.
It is even claimed that M15 once planned to recruit a team of specially-trained gerbils as a secret weapon to sniff out spies.
The rodents were found near the Iranian border allegedly equipped
with eavesdropping devices. The reports have come from the official Islamic Republic News Agency (IRNA).When asked about the confiscation of the spy squirrels, the national police chief said: "I have heard about it, but I do not have precise information."
The IRNA said that the squirrels were kitted out by foreign intelligence services - but they were captured two weeks ago by police officers.
A Foreign Office source told Sky News: "The story is nuts."
But if true, this would not be the first time animals have been used to spy. During World War II the Allied Forces used pigeons to fly vital intelligence out of occupied France.
More recently, US marines stationed in Kuwait have used chickens as a low-tech chemical detection system. It is also well documented that dolphins have been used to seek out underwater mines.
It is even claimed that M15 once planned to recruit a team of specially-trained gerbils as a secret weapon to sniff out spies.
Thursday, June 07, 2007
Sex Facts
Random sex-facts courtesy of side.no
Here goes!
Men get twice as horny during the summer than other times of year.
- not friggin possible!
Rats are able to have sex 20 times a day.
- so am I! Technically...
Two out of three Norwegian couples have sex every week during summer.
- and for those who don't, it's probably too hot.
Women in relationships want sex less than single women.
- makes sense: you always want what you can't have
Only about 50% of women want sex regularly after four years into a relationship.
- hoping never to experience that
One out of four women find men with a lot of money more sexy than other men.
- weeell.... I'm not sure if I can argue with that one...
The midnight sun in the north of Norway increases apetite for sex.
- the midnight sun is the same sun as the midday sun so... well, that's just logic..
Biologically, women would rather have sex with sweaty than with men right out of the shower. The reason is that sweat contains a hormone which makes women horny.
- But please guys, please wash downstairs first..!
Only 44% of us are completely satisfied with our sex lives, 60% think sex is a fun and important part of life.
- I'm impressed people are actually satisfied - we seem to have lost the ability to appreciate what we have these days.
More than half of us fantasize about money more often than about sex.
- proud to say I'm not part of that half..
Tall men more often have a partner, and, on average, gives their partner more orgasms than shorter men.
- as said in a documentary looking into human attraction and physical appearance: if you want to get laid, "guys, you don't have to be a gentlemen or wear the newest clothes - don't bother going to the gym, just be tall!"
Red headed women have more partners and more sex than other women.
- apparently men who see women with red hair immideatly think they're turned on. No clue why.
45% of side2.no readers own one or more sex toys.
- conservative readers?
Another 20% say they want one.
- you won't know how you ever manged without one.
50% of British workers say they've pictured their boss naked.
- people say that "if you're nervous about having to speak in front of a group of people, just picture them naked." - I find it more entertaining to picture people on the toilet. All red in the face, trying to squeeze out a big one. "Yiiiiiegghhh!!!"
Lipstick is said to have been invented in Egypt because the men wanted their women to have beautiful lips when performing oral sex.
- not sure how much I trust this one - I've always heard women invented lipstick because men are more attracted to youthful and full lips, which are more likely to be red. FYI, lips also turn redder when a person is turned on.
96% of men and 90% of women sometimes fantasize about sex with someone other than their partner.
- and the rest of them are lying.
30% of women admit to having faked an orgasm.
- see previous comment.
Men ejaculate, on average, 7200 times during their lives.
- from age 10 until 70, 60 years, that's 120 times a year - 3 times a week.
Most women say they would give up all forms of sex for 15 months, getting in return a brand new wardrobe.
- if I were single... sure! Wait a minute... what does 'all forms of sex' mean? If that means what I think it means, I wouldn't stand a chance. Never more than 4 days. I've tried. Several times.
People with allergies may experience a relief of their sufferings after sex.
- "honey, my throat itches, come give a blow job!"
An orgasm may help relieve pain because it increases your level of endorphins.
- old news.. still good news though.
British women most often fantasize about fire fighters (47%), soldiers (28%), business men (27%), doctors (26%) and football players (20%).
Interestingly, those numbers add up to 148%..
An hour of sex burns 360 calories.
- that's motivation right there. Guys should learn those numbers.
Sex can give women better looking hair and skin because it increases the production of oestrogen.
- again guys, just remember this, go dig up some facts and numbres, and casually share the info with your girlfriend some time.
40% of the British population say they would choose to be celibate - if that guaranteed them a life lasting 100 years.
- you have to live until you're a hundred and you don't get to have sex?? Where's the fun in that? (Either the people who answered yes were old, or they didn't think about the fact that no sex, most likely no children, no grandchildren, no one to care for, and who cares for you when you're 98 except your friends... who died when you were 82. Some life...). I'm immortal anyway.
Here goes!
Men get twice as horny during the summer than other times of year.
- not friggin possible!
Rats are able to have sex 20 times a day.
- so am I! Technically...
Two out of three Norwegian couples have sex every week during summer.
- and for those who don't, it's probably too hot.
Women in relationships want sex less than single women.
- makes sense: you always want what you can't have
Only about 50% of women want sex regularly after four years into a relationship.
- hoping never to experience that
One out of four women find men with a lot of money more sexy than other men.
- weeell.... I'm not sure if I can argue with that one...
The midnight sun in the north of Norway increases apetite for sex.
- the midnight sun is the same sun as the midday sun so... well, that's just logic..
Biologically, women would rather have sex with sweaty than with men right out of the shower. The reason is that sweat contains a hormone which makes women horny.
- But please guys, please wash downstairs first..!
Only 44% of us are completely satisfied with our sex lives, 60% think sex is a fun and important part of life.
- I'm impressed people are actually satisfied - we seem to have lost the ability to appreciate what we have these days.
More than half of us fantasize about money more often than about sex.
- proud to say I'm not part of that half..
Tall men more often have a partner, and, on average, gives their partner more orgasms than shorter men.
- as said in a documentary looking into human attraction and physical appearance: if you want to get laid, "guys, you don't have to be a gentlemen or wear the newest clothes - don't bother going to the gym, just be tall!"
Red headed women have more partners and more sex than other women.
- apparently men who see women with red hair immideatly think they're turned on. No clue why.
45% of side2.no readers own one or more sex toys.
- conservative readers?
Another 20% say they want one.
- you won't know how you ever manged without one.
50% of British workers say they've pictured their boss naked.
- people say that "if you're nervous about having to speak in front of a group of people, just picture them naked." - I find it more entertaining to picture people on the toilet. All red in the face, trying to squeeze out a big one. "Yiiiiiegghhh!!!"
Lipstick is said to have been invented in Egypt because the men wanted their women to have beautiful lips when performing oral sex.
- not sure how much I trust this one - I've always heard women invented lipstick because men are more attracted to youthful and full lips, which are more likely to be red. FYI, lips also turn redder when a person is turned on.
96% of men and 90% of women sometimes fantasize about sex with someone other than their partner.
- and the rest of them are lying.
30% of women admit to having faked an orgasm.
- see previous comment.
Men ejaculate, on average, 7200 times during their lives.
- from age 10 until 70, 60 years, that's 120 times a year - 3 times a week.
Most women say they would give up all forms of sex for 15 months, getting in return a brand new wardrobe.
- if I were single... sure! Wait a minute... what does 'all forms of sex' mean? If that means what I think it means, I wouldn't stand a chance. Never more than 4 days. I've tried. Several times.
People with allergies may experience a relief of their sufferings after sex.
- "honey, my throat itches, come give a blow job!"
An orgasm may help relieve pain because it increases your level of endorphins.
- old news.. still good news though.
British women most often fantasize about fire fighters (47%), soldiers (28%), business men (27%), doctors (26%) and football players (20%).
Interestingly, those numbers add up to 148%..
An hour of sex burns 360 calories.
- that's motivation right there. Guys should learn those numbers.
Sex can give women better looking hair and skin because it increases the production of oestrogen.
- again guys, just remember this, go dig up some facts and numbres, and casually share the info with your girlfriend some time.
40% of the British population say they would choose to be celibate - if that guaranteed them a life lasting 100 years.
- you have to live until you're a hundred and you don't get to have sex?? Where's the fun in that? (Either the people who answered yes were old, or they didn't think about the fact that no sex, most likely no children, no grandchildren, no one to care for, and who cares for you when you're 98 except your friends... who died when you were 82. Some life...). I'm immortal anyway.
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
*no title*
Jeg kjente en en gang, på andre siden av havet, som hadde en
stemme som krøp ned i tærne og ut i fingertuppene og til slutt
satte seg fast i hjertet et sted.
Jeg likte hans stemme og han likte min og vi brukte mange mange
timer på å lytte til hverandre si mange meningsløse ting som ikke
virker så meningsløse nå lenger.
Stemmen forsvant men jeg glemmer den aldri.
stemme som krøp ned i tærne og ut i fingertuppene og til slutt
satte seg fast i hjertet et sted.
Jeg likte hans stemme og han likte min og vi brukte mange mange
timer på å lytte til hverandre si mange meningsløse ting som ikke
virker så meningsløse nå lenger.
Stemmen forsvant men jeg glemmer den aldri.
Sunday, May 20, 2007
the Creepy Guy from home
"Hi.. it was me who were there just now, ringing the door bell at your place..do you live in Honndalen?* Maybe we could go for a walk sometime? - Matt"
*town where I'm from - "home"
- Guy had been at home to sell lottery tickets for a football club. Apparently sister had opened the door. Sister is 14. Guy, I find, is 29 or 30.
"I think you've sent this to the wrong person - I haven't been at home since Easter. But... stay away from my little sister, she's a bit too young for you :)"
"Hmm... now this is funny :) no, I wasn't planning on going after your sister... you got msn? Maybe we could chat?"
Turns out the guy, who has just moved back to town, thought my little sister was me, he knew I was born in 84 and therefore should be 23, asked his mother about me/my sister and decided to send her/me a message.
I explained the misunderstanding, asked my parents who this guy is and told my sister, to the family's great amusement, to stay the hell away from grown men! She was just offended someone thought she was my age, I quote "I don't look that old!!"
Saying this was one of the creepiest messages I've got is not an exaggeration... What was new with this was it didn't get creepy until I had my suspicions confirmed, realizing he had the hots for my sister. Who is 16 years younger than him. He's more than twice her age!
Not to mention that if he had sent this message to my sister instead of me they might have met, him thinking she was older than she was, her thinking he... I'm not even sure I want to go there...
*creepy*
*town where I'm from - "home"
- Guy had been at home to sell lottery tickets for a football club. Apparently sister had opened the door. Sister is 14. Guy, I find, is 29 or 30.
"I think you've sent this to the wrong person - I haven't been at home since Easter. But... stay away from my little sister, she's a bit too young for you :)"
"Hmm... now this is funny :) no, I wasn't planning on going after your sister... you got msn? Maybe we could chat?"
Turns out the guy, who has just moved back to town, thought my little sister was me, he knew I was born in 84 and therefore should be 23, asked his mother about me/my sister and decided to send her/me a message.
I explained the misunderstanding, asked my parents who this guy is and told my sister, to the family's great amusement, to stay the hell away from grown men! She was just offended someone thought she was my age, I quote "I don't look that old!!"
Saying this was one of the creepiest messages I've got is not an exaggeration... What was new with this was it didn't get creepy until I had my suspicions confirmed, realizing he had the hots for my sister. Who is 16 years younger than him. He's more than twice her age!
Not to mention that if he had sent this message to my sister instead of me they might have met, him thinking she was older than she was, her thinking he... I'm not even sure I want to go there...
*creepy*
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
May 16th
I was gonna say something really smart but I can't remember what it was... But then again, nobody in Norway is sober on May 16th, are they?
May 16th is the day before May 17th, Norway's Independence Day. It's a day like none other. If you don't believe me, google it.
It's the last day of the russ, after a few months of celebration, they will finally be graduating high school. It seems like a much bigger deal in "the middle of nowhere", where I'm from, than in the city...
I have no idea what I was gonna say... I forgot... so sue me (I'm gonna hope you're not an American here...).
Well...I'm gonna go have sex with my boyfriend now (I was supposed to be at his place 2 hours ago..) so... bye bye!
(If there's one thing I'm thankful for it's that I know *Touch*, otherwise this post would never have seen the light of day!)
May 16th is the day before May 17th, Norway's Independence Day. It's a day like none other. If you don't believe me, google it.
It's the last day of the russ, after a few months of celebration, they will finally be graduating high school. It seems like a much bigger deal in "the middle of nowhere", where I'm from, than in the city...
I have no idea what I was gonna say... I forgot... so sue me (I'm gonna hope you're not an American here...).
Well...I'm gonna go have sex with my boyfriend now (I was supposed to be at his place 2 hours ago..) so... bye bye!
(If there's one thing I'm thankful for it's that I know *Touch*, otherwise this post would never have seen the light of day!)
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Saturday, May 12, 2007
Ariane
Try and seduce Ariane, a model in an 'interactive universe'.
You can take her out to dinner, visit an amusement park or an art museum. Or you can stay in, have a BBQ or go skinny dipping.
If you're lucky you'll get her naked, in the tub, the pool, the shower or anywhere!
But be careful, The Guy got her all ready to roll on the kitchen table but apparently he'd served her a little too much wine along the way and she fell asleep.
The object is, at least as far as I'm concerned, to get her to bed (or anywhere else for that matter). And I have to say - girls can be a pain in the butt and I have no idea why you guys would ever bother going through all this!
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Absent Canadian and "The story of the skull"
This may or may not be the blog of Mike Helms, the Absent Canadian.I'm not entirely sure what he writes about but one of the comments he's gotten has made me like him already;
"DEAR “mikehelms” What in GODS name makes you say that about OUR military? Who are you to talk about them? Are you ASHAMED that YOU dont have the GUTS to defend YOUR OWN right to talk [...]"
Mike's reply?
[...]as long as I have wind in my lungs, I’ll happily proclaim that I would FAR rather spend my tax dollars on educating young people from ALL nations, instead of funding a military that is engaged in an illegal, immoral war.[...]
Check out his page, if nothing else, his "Story of the skull" should make you laugh.
...I want a skull too... I mean, another one. I have one, I know, but I want one more. You can never have enough skulls, right?
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